just pretend

.16

"Guys I've been texting my friend about getting tattoos and he finally got back to me." We all furrow our eyebrows when we look to Liv. She's still on Aleks lap but now on her phone. "He's a tat artist of ten years trust me he ain't sketchy but we pay extra and he can do it."

"When?" Leo asks.

"Tonight?" She shrugs. "You guys down?"

"Yeah!" I hear Mia shout.

"Fuck yeah, I'm in too," Leo agrees and looks to me. I smile to say hell yeah.

"None of us got that much cash on us though," Elle says.

"Get it to me by Friday. Let's go now he's just downtown."

"Which one of us is sober."

"I can drive," Elle says. "I only drank a bit." Still illégal with a G2 but ah well.

"Y'all are fucking crazy," Aleks laughs as Liv gets off his lap. "The hell did you meet these people?" He laughs to me.

"Let's go kiddos, get in the car." Elle swirls her keys on her finger.

Liv takes shotgun leaving Gabe, Leo and I squished in the back and Mia just lays on us. Aleks goes home because he decides he doesn't want some sketchy tattoo that his parents will kill him over.

It's a painful drive with us all squished together but also because we all can't stop laughing.

Mia continues to pass around a bottle of Smirnoff which Elle of course declines because she's driving.

She finally parks and we all pour out of the car gasping for air from laughing in such a cramped space. Ears bleeding from the blaring music.

"Whatcha going to get?" Leo puts his hand on my shoulder.

"I don't fucking know," I laugh. "A duck."

"Get a light sabre."

"Y'all are too drunk to pick what you want," Elle says.

"Make it a simple tattoo I don't want to be here all night. His friend might be in so maybe it'll be quicker," Liv says as we stand outside the shop. It says closed but we walk in anyway.

"Can I tattoo someone?" Leo asks.

"Oh I want to sign somebody!" I say. Leo and I just laugh.

"Can I sign you then?"

"Only if I can."

"You fucking idiots," Elle laughs.

Liv starts talking to the tattoo artist. He looks to be late thirties and is covered in tattoos. They discuss payment and signing papers and then he talks to us because this whole ordeal is illegal and he could get in big trouble. Of course this makes our tattoos nearly double the prices. He's a family friend to Liv as well.

"Who's first?"

Liv's hand shoots up. Her and Mia get matching ones. Just simple hearts on their lower backs.

Meanwhile I make Leo write his name on a paper eighty times but it's all screwy looking. "I have three letters in my name. You have... A, N, D... six!"

I'm so going to hate myself tomorrow.

We all sit around and watch Gabe get some game themed tattoo that no one understands. Then it's Leo and I.

Both of us are pissing ourselves laughing, already too drunk to write out our names normally how the hell we supposed to do it with a permanent needle while laughing.

This is such a bad idea, this guy is crazier then we are.

He goes first and decides on lower torso right before his hip starts on the right side.

Elle tries to help guide my hand because I'm not tracing my name I'm just free handing spelling what should be easy.

"You two are fucking stupid," Gabe says.

"Matching tats are fun," Liv says to Gabe. "Too bad you have no one to match with." She sticks her tongue out at him like a child.

"By the way when I regret this later I'm blaming it on you Elle because you're sober," Leo says through the pain.

Then last is me.

I curse at how much he takes his time. Despite being wasted as hell he tries to make it neat.

We're all given instructions on how to take care of it while it heals. The do's and dont's before we all pile back in the car careful to not touch each other's tattoos. This time Mia sits squished in shotgun with Liv so she's no laying on her back.

Gabe just goes on about what idiots we all are even though he too got a tattoo.

Leo says he'll pay for anyone who doesn't have the money so he's going to pay for Gabe's.

"This guy just made bank on a whole bunch of drunk teens. Smart but very dumb," Elle says as she parks the car back at the garage.

I try to find my phone to check the time but it's not on me.

I eventually find it on the table in the garage from where I've thrown it earlier and there's literally a million texts from mom and Keanu.

Keanu: ur mom is looking for u
Keanu: where r u
Keanu: r u okay?
Keanu: plz answer ur mom is freaking out

Mom: Andrew where are you?
Mom: get home now please
Mom: Andrew

+12 other texts.

I text back my mom
Me: not dead

Before I shut off my phone again and ignore it.

When I turn off my phone I get another thousand texts.

Mom: where are you?
Mom: what are you doing?
Mom: answer me right now

My head hurts. The light gives me a headache so I try to think of something before turning off my phone.

Me: with Leo. I didn't answer cuz i was sleeping. Goodnight

Surely she can't get mad at me if I was "sleeping" at a reasonable hour.

"Leo, let me see yours again," Liv says. He pulls up his shirt to where my name is written and I can't help but laugh, forgetting all about mom and Keanu I drop my phone and go stand beside him. "Okay let me see yours too, side by side."

I also lift my shirt.

"This will be a fun story to explain when you all get married," Gabe laughs. "Your fucking wife gives you head and all she sees is some other guys name."

"Aha Keanu is going to kill you," Elle says.

"Oh fuck she's gonna to skin me alive," I say. "I'll just put a bandaid on, she'll never notice."

"Every time you're going to where a bandaid?" Gabe asks.

"Do not even start talking about him and my sister," Leo says with over dramatic gagging noises.

"This is a sober me problem."

——
Lol I find this chapter funny because literally a week after I wrote it I got a tattoo without my mom knowing with my friends. Hurt like a bitch tho. I also had no idea I was gonna get the tattoo when I wrote this.