IM NOT HELL COZ IM THE HELL

seventy five(tired✔)

Valirie POV
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Napahawak ako sa mata ko...BULL SHITTTTTT....
why can't this fucking tear stop from falling!!!!

nakakairita na huh!!!kanina pa ako umiiyak...

Does I need to cry this much???

Eh anong magagawa ko...

Minahal ko yung tao....MAHAL KO YUNG TAO..

pero I guesss...I need to surrender...Not for me..but for him....he already like someone!!

Agad akong tumayo sa pagkahiga...

Ilang...ilang oras na rin akong naka-higa dito...I tried to sleep...but my eyes can't...masakit...masakit..kaya di ko na pinilit...

Lumabas ako sa kwarto...tsaka bumaba...naglakad lng ako..wala ehh..im not in mood...

Nakita kong palabas din si asher sa kwarto..nila.....nya...

Agad akong pumunta sa kusina..nandun din si gray...may hawak na kutsilyo...

Kumuha lng ako ng isang basong tubig sa ref..

Umuwi na siya!!!sabi ni gray

Tiningnan ko lng sya...pake ko pa bah...ANO BA NYA AKO!!

Wanna eat??tanong nito

Hindi ko ulit sya sinagot tapos sinara ang ref..

Gusto mo bang mamatay??tanong nito

Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay..

Ilang araw ka ng hindi kumakain ha!!sabi nito

I shrug tsaka lumabas...

Here..catch---sabi ni gray kaso pinutol ko

Im not hungry!!sabi ko sa cold na boses tsaka naglakad papasok sa kwarto ko....

Ininom ko ang tubig...tsaka humiga sa kama...

I close my eyes...

Trying to get a sleep in this situation...

~~~~~~~~~hooouurrrrsss paass~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kung lutang si otor...mas lutang ako...

Di ako nakatulog...bwesit...ma-iinsomia ata ako ehhh...bwesiittttttttt...

Napatingin ako sa wallclock...

Its already five...five A.M....

Tas..di pa ako nakatulog....agad akong pumasok sa CR ko...tsaka naligo...pagkatapos ko maligo..ay nagbihis ako ng casual kong damit pangbahay....

Na-upo sa kama...

I just learn something...

Here I am...
Just about to swallow my pride...
Saying what love is....

So,what is it love,really?
Love can be kind...And It can be cruel..
Love can be simple...Or complex..
It can be real...Or just a MERE fantasy...
It can be sometimes clear...And confusing..
So yeah...Love is putting someone else before yours..LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL..

So why.."LOVE"??
Well..its the closest thing we nearest encounter...
It might be just a figment of our imagination playing but....does that mean it is real???

"LOVE" is a short word easy to spell..
Difficult to DEFINE and impossible to live without...
Waking up without the one in your heart..
What it is the most irritating part of your relationship...is when you lose him...you will cry for him...,again and again..

Like what he said "we'll forever love each other and no one can do us apart..."
But where is he now...finding another woman to promise the words he says to you...

"Falling inlove is not the most stupid thing the person does...but its the most happiest part of a persons felt...
Falling inlove is just a normal phenomena..."

We cant resist other persons charm..
But if we know the one we love has its own couple..
You can say that your pathetic,stupid and ridiculous...loving a person who doesn't like you..but if you think it about a million times...
You will realize that you should be happy,happy for them because they are happy with each others presence..

Your love is now happy without single pain seeing in his eyes..in filipino term..."pagpaparaya" or "letting go"..

Love is a magical word..where everybody cries and move on..
Love make them 'trust' about FOREVER and LIFETIME...
But I say this..."Even if you trust forever in your lifetime,you couldn't predict your own future..and future of your own relationship"

And lem'me put a little bit of science fact..
Never trust an atom because they made up everything....

Tsaka I realize something to...

When you learn to love someone...learn to let them go too....

Kaso...di ko yun natutunan...tututunan ko plang....

Agad akong tumayo....ano pa nga bah....
Bumaba ako..ayoko ko namang magmukmok lng dun buong araw..tas di naman ako magaaral..

Habang pababa...naglakad lng ako....binibilang ang mga hakbang ginagawa ko.....its seem na parang kahapon lng...mas ginugusto kong tumakbo kesa maglakad....
Manghabol...kesa...habulin...at..magmahal..kesa mahalin..

Pero...mali pala...things need to balance...

Pagbaba ko tamang tama na kalalabas lng nila galing sa kusina....

Hindi ka talaga papasok??tanong ni kuya

Cut thag crap Wu!!!matamlay na sabi ko tsaka naglakad papunta sa garden ng bahay....

(Wu:apelyedo ni vic sa totoong pagkatao nito)

Napansin ko ang pagkabigla nya kanina...coz I never talk to him using that name....he probably know that im in deep pain now...

Sumandal ako dun sa punong dati ay inakyat ko..pinikit ko ang mata ko.....nilagay ko ang earphone ko sa tenga...nagpatugtog ng kung ano ano..tsaka nilakasan ng todo..at tumahimik....

Can't I be happy...
Can some one cheer me up...someone's here wanna die now...

Agad na nagflash lahat ng mga memories namin ni asher...kasunod nun ay ang iba't-ibang paglabas ng mga mukha..mga tawa..tampuhan...ngitian...galitan..at kiligan...

Kiligang never ng mauulit...

Why are you crying???tanong ng isang boses

Napamulat ako at napahawak sa mukha ko...
Basa...umiyak nga ba ako..

I did??takang tanong ko

Tumango lng sya...

Just reminiscing something...sabi ko

If there a struggle between you and asher....please...don't jump to a decision that makes you hurt more!!pagsusumamong sabi nito

But I need to...I'm sorry..sabi ko at patakbong pumunta sa loob ng bahay tsaka pumasok sa kwarto ko...i cried again...

Traitor tears...

Im sorry ate chel...I've done everything to make this balance...but it can...I just think That im fooling my own self...kasi...
Kahjt alam kong wala na...pinaglalaban ko pa...

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A/N:..

WALAAAAA!!!!!!

~B.JaneArrah
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