However, though Jennie was tiny, she had surprising strength as she suddenly grabbed my wrist and pulled me back towards her. She lightly pushed me back against the counter and put both hands on either side of me before I could properly react.
God damn her for knowing me well enough to know exactly what I was going to do.
"Well, I've got you trapped under me. Now you have no choice but to tell me what the hell is wrong."
Not exactly the way I wanna be under you but alright.
I held my resolve, maintaining eye contact, refusing to give in to her.
Not anymore.
As seconds ticked by, I could feel her getting closer and closer. Her hands had moved from the counter to my waist and I was so aware of this fact that, if she weren't holding me, I'd have fallen to my knees.
Our noses were touching and we were practically sharing the same air and I felt unbelievably light headed.
"Stop." I meant for it to come out like a strong demand but all I could conjure up was a whispered plea.
"Why?" She whispered back and I almost unraveled in her arms.
I closed my eyes and turned my face to the other side, not being able to handle our extremely close proximity anymore.
She put her forehead against my temple and tightened her hold on my waist.
"Is this perhaps about the guy I kissed back at the club?" She had the nerve to say and that was the last straw.
I forced my way out of her grip and stormed out of the kitchen.
"It is, isn't it?" Jennie was saying, coming after me.
"What if it was, huh? What would you do? Why the fuck would you care?" I almost screamed, grabbing and pulling at my hair, both out of frustration and despair.
The image of Jennie kissing that guy wasn't something I wanted in my mind right now.
"Rosie.....I thought---"
"Well, you thought wrong." I spat.
Tears started streaming down my face again and I felt so emotionally and physically exhausted, I didn't even try to stop them. I just let them fall, feeling everything in me break, fall apart, shatter.
"Oh Rosie." Jennie whispered.
She made her way over to me and held me. She didn't say anything. She just held me and I was sobbing, clutching onto her for dear life.
"I'm sorry. I tried, Jennie. I really did. I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry. I ruined everything." I said in between sobs.
"I just can't seem to fucking get over you."
Jennie still didn't say anything. Instead, she held my face in between her hands. She wiped the tears off my face with her sleeves and then just stared at me. She put her forehead against mine and took a deep breath, still staring deep into my eyes.
"Oh fuck it."
Then she kissed me.
My knees immediately weakened and I was clutching her hips like they were an anchor to life.
She kissed me and everything lit up in my body. I was feeling so many intense emotions that everything seemed to jumble together into one huge overwhelming ball of pure emotion in the very pit of my heart.
It wasn't a particularly fiery kiss. It was soft. Gentle, but firm. She held my face and stroked my cheeks and nibbled on my bottom lip and it all felt so sinfully perfect, I wanted to slap myself to wake up.
We finally pulled apart and I was still clutching her like a lifeline and she was still holding my face so tenderly, I had to force a fresh wave of tears from overcoming me.
Neither of us said anything for a while, until I broke the silence.
"What was that for." I whispered.
"I'm sorry too." She replied. "For hurting you. For making you go through all that shit. It's just that.....ugh, it's so hard to explain."
She bit her lip.
Oh no, don't do that.
She must've felt me stiffen up because her lips pulled up into a knowing smirk for a split second before remembering that now was probably not the time.
"I just didn't know whether you still liked me or not. I don't know what I was thinking when I kissed that guy. Probably to see how you'd react, and boy did you react." She said, a small smile coming on her face.
"Please forgive me. I truly did not mean to hurt you. I....I...." She hesitated, biting her lips again.
Quit that.
"I love you."
Oh.
Cool.
I was sure I had the dopiest smile on my face just then, but I didn't even care.
She loved me. Jennie Kim loved me.
"So? Am I forgiven?" She said, moving her hands to the back of my neck and pulling me just that bit closer to her.
"Hmm....If I say no, would you kiss me again?" I said cheekily.
Jennie gave me a throaty chuckle and said.
"I would kiss you senseless whatever your answer."
"Do it, then."
And so she did.
She asked for forgiveness and I forgave her all night long.
*********
me: *is trying to sleep*
me: *eyes suddenly snap wide open*
me: m-must.....write....,.,.,., chaennie.
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