ruin▹rilaya

𝘵𝘸𝘰

ᴍᴀʏᴀ 

It's been a week since the first day of school.

And here I am, still miserable over a feeling I can't even make out.

Riley hasn't really been talking to me as much. She's always hanging out with Lucas and I just feel alone. Everything hurts so much and I can't deal with it. My best friend since forever is completely forgetting about me because of some guy she just met.

After another terrible day of school, I go over to Topanga's, a little bakery owned by Riley's mom. I sit in the small bay window and sip on some coffee as I scroll through my phone. I see a picture of Riley and Lucas on Instagram and immediately exit out of the app. I finish my coffee and try not to completely shatter the mug in anger. I'm having a fun Friday afternoon.

I hear the door to the bakery open and see Farkle walk in. I call out his name and he comes over.

"Hey, Maya," he greets. "What's up?"

"I lied," I spit out. "I don't like Lucas, I never liked him."

"Oh, then what is it?"

I try to put my feelings in words but end up groaning in frustration. "I don't know, Farkle, I just...help me, please?"

He sits next to me and looks me in the eye. "What's happening, Maya?"

I cover my face with my hands. "Fuck if I know."

"How am I supposed to help if you don't even know?!"

I groan and bite my lip. "I can't stop thinking about Riley and Lucas. The two of them together is making me sick, but I definitely do not have a crush on Lucas. I told myself that I'm just being overprotective of her, but that isn't it. Then, I kept telling myself it's because I'm jealous that Riley found someone first, but that's not it either. I just...hate them together."

He slowly nods and processes what I told him. After a few minutes, I get a little impatient with the silence.

"Say something!" I shout irritatedly.

"It sounds like you like Riley," he cautiously says.

"Of course, I like Riley! She's my best friend, how could I not-"

"No," he cuts me off. "Like, maybe more than a friend."

My eyes widen and I let out a forced laugh. "I don't like her, how could I like my best friend?"

"Well, let's see...you don't like Lucas, you hate them together, you can't stop thinking about her, and trust me, the list can go on and on."

"No," I quickly say. "I don't."

"Honestly, I kind of expected it. You two are way too close to be just friends. The hand holding? The nicknames? The forehead and cheek kisses? Sure, I guess some friends do that, but you look at her like she's the only person in the room. For fuck's sake, she grabs your chin whenever you're sad and your face lights up in seconds."

I raise my eyebrows as he rambles all of this out. "Wow, was that all in the back of your head?"

He lightly laughs. "Maya, just admit it."

"I can't, she likes him and I don't like her, okay?!" I shout, mostly trying to convince myself.

Why am I realizing this now? Is it because there's someone else who has their eyes set on her? I really don't want her to go out with Lucas. Before him, I had nothing to worry about. It was just us two and I didn't really think too much of it, but I really love it when it's just us two.