dopamine!, [Incomplete, TAKING A BREAK! :>] ☹

love me? no.

A/N i'm tired asf per usual y'all probably tired of my shenanigans, this progressively gets worse as you read because i started this at like 1 PM and i'm just finishing it at 12 AM because procrastination exists so, sorta, hopefully enjoy this part, and the photo of nick pretending to be a model.

Lane's POV

I feel like shit, because i am shit, all i could think about was how angry and upset bella must be at me. It's not my fault...Edward was the one who caused it...although I still had feelings...even when he just broke up with her..THAT was a dick move. Maybe it's just best if i call quits...i feel like we should just stop. Stop feeling emotions. Stop feeling the way bella wants to feel. Yeah..i'll try..

Edward's POV

Seriously?! What is wrong with you Edward?! Just, focus. focus...I need to talk to Lane..then to bella..yeah, alright, easy. After school i tried finding lane, i looked for his scent the most, he was talking to arden outside, i ran towards him hoping he'd notice me, in which he did but he ignored me, i kept running anyway until i hugged him, he fought to get out of my embrace which he kept punching me in the stomach. ouch. I let go as i frowned "Stop it weirdo!" he shouted at me "Listen, i'm calling quits, i don't want anything to do with you" he just blurted out...that easily? What'd i do..? i just stood there "no. you're not lane..listen to me" he refused but i made him "LISTEN." i shouted holding lane, making him stay in place, he was a little startled. It got quiet "You're not GOING anywhere. AT ALL" i kept yelling, he pushed me "I'll do whatever i want okay? And i don't need YOU to ruin that for me you bastard" He yelled back, i got even angrier "Shut up lane" "Aww what are you gonna do? bite me?" he fake pitied, "I said shut up." "Boo hoo im so scared" lane scoffed, "I said SHUT UP" I got angry enough, he pushed my buttons. I grabbed him much harder and kept pushing him, until he hit a tree...i regret that, i hesitated. Until i kissed him..forcefully. He kissed back. I didn't care if anyone was watching, i just wanted to apologize...well..kinda. It went from there as we got a little touchy but we maintained to refrain ourselves. We both pulled away as i looked down at him "Love me.." i whispered to him, "no." he whispered back, i smiled shyly and tried again "..love me.." "No." he responded again "I can't love you when you haven't even asked to be mine yet" he looked down at the ground, staring at my shoes, i sighed realizing how dumb i am "Fair enough" we both chuckled "Can i try again?" i asked, he nodded. "Will you do me the honor, of being my boyfriend, and potentially, hopefully, loving me?" he looked at me and cringed a little then nodded "mhm" i can understand why. He hugged me as i held him, We felt bad leaving without arden so we took him with us and went to lane's, for some reason he looked a little scared but gave in.

Lane's POV

Oh gosh no. My home? I honestly can't remember what it looks like, messy or not it's still horrible. We walked all the way to my house, as i opened the door i started to have more relief, i let them inside as arden already knew where to go, as he went upstairs. I looked around just to make sure everything was fine..yeah, "You can uhm..follow arden" i hinted, he nodded then went upstairs as well, i tried my best to relax by going to my room and listening to music, it sorta worked. After doing my homework i figured i could take a nap, so i did. Slowly closing my eyes, drifting off into bliss, where my happy place was.... i felt something cold, i liked it, i loved it. I dreamed, i dreamed of Edward, but a not so...let's say, 'kid friendly' edward, a very explicit and provocative edward, jesus what is wrong with my brain today, stop it stop it stop it, IT WOULDNT STOP, my mind just got dirtier by the second and i didn't know why or what was causing it. Apparently the dream version of me loved this, which is crazy because i'd never think of being this confident and comfortable with my body. Long story short it ended up being the most awfully absurd and awkward 'wet dream' i honestly could imagine, i'm going to hell for that. I tried waking up to get this whole dream thing over with, in which i successfully succeeded at the very end of the dream, that coldness? that was edward, and why was he next to me? he was reading my dreams....shit. i just pretended to have never dreamt it, when the very second he noticed i was awake he asked "did you just dream of me fucking yo-" "Who knows don't shame me for it" I buried my head in the pillow, it was silent "...i mean i could make your dreams come true" Did he really just say that? Gross. "No thank you, i wish i could die peacefully without you saying that, if anything i thought you would 'wait till marriage' because that's what you said to bella....why am i so different? why do you handle me differently?" i really wanted to know, it made no sense to me.. "Because you're different, and i'm sorry that i said that...it just came out.." he looked down "Well here's for starters, you're not getting my virginity any time soon, so dont get your hopes up, but you can get a high five" i raised my hand up a little, he chuckled and gave me a high five, intertwining hands afterwards. We talked and stayed up almost all night until i felt tired, i yawned a couple times until i fell asleep again, i could hear a faint whisper "..Love me?" edward asked again, i nodded "yeah.." as i drifted off to sleep.