Chapter 30

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 You don't know how long you stared at the spot where Loki and Thor disappeared from, kneeling in the dirt outside in the January cold. It felt like a long time, but your grasp on reality seemed to shatter when Loki was taken away from you.

You couldn't just sit around and wait. You couldn't just accept that he was gone. You knew, not from his words, but from his tone, that he knew he was never going to be able to return. You didn't know if he would be imprisoned or killed, but you couldn't, wouldn't allow either, not without a fight. It was time, before the team found out, before they started watching you too closely, to keep you from doing the exact thing you were going to go do.

You forced yourself back to your feet and with one last glance at the spot your love had disappeared from, snuck back into the tower, taking the stairs and less obvious ways back up to your room. You didn't want to be caught by the team who would worry and stop you. They'd insist everything would be ok, and you didn't want or need false promises. You needed to know what would happen and how to help there was only one way to find out.

You went to Loki's room first and grabbed the first dagger you found. There were tons of them scattered around the tower. You hesitated again at doing this, but you were so sure that Loki was in trouble, real trouble. You had to try to save him if you could. You also needed to know the truth about what was going on in Asgard. When Thor returned, he would edit events to try to spare your feelings, to try to keep your fragile grip on reality from breaking. It would be thoughtful, of course, but not what you needed. So you took the dagger and slipped into your own room, locking the door and then locking yourself in the bathroom for good measure.

You placed a towel to catch the blood and had to steel yourself. You'd never done this on purpose, never used the power outside of someone else's control. You gripped the dagger, made your plan, then made the cut, praising Loki for summoning extremely sharp daggers as you dragged the blade down the outside of your left arm, crossing over so many old scars to open yourself as far to prophecy as you could.

You closed your eyes, dropped the blade and spoke the words "What's going to happen to Loki in Asgard? How do I help him?"

*

You saw Thor leading Loki in chains down the long hallway from your dreams to the throne. The man with one eye, Odin, you realized, was sitting in the throne, watching impassively at the sight of the heartbreak in Thor's eyes for having to do this, at the sorrow and pain in Loki's. You saw the woman with tears in her eyes standing next to Odin's throne, Frigga, Odin's wife. She would have run to her sons had Odin not placed a restraining hand on her arm. "Frigga, I have let you stay because this matter concerns your sons. Do not interfere," Odin told her firmly, but gently. If he loved anything, it was Frigga. She stepped back to her place, but it pained her. Thor stepped off to the side, leaving Loki to face the inquisition alone. Odin turned his attention to Loki. "I sent you to Midgard to prove yourself something more than a heartless soulless monster. You killed over 200 mortals in cold blood when you were supposed to be there working to help the people your previous actions harmed. Explain yourself,"

Loki took a breath. "I did kill those mortals. I will not deny it. It was in defense of the woman I love," he started. The vision skipped as he explained how you were abducted, tortured for a year, and how he had killed the people who had hurt you.

"Your dalliance with a mortal has no bearing on this," Odin roared at Loki.

"It is not a dalliance. I love her!" Loki replied. Odin made a 'bwah' sound of disbelief.

*

Thor was standing in front of Odin, Loki off to the side now, muzzled with some kind of metal gag to keep him from interrupting. "Tell me what happened. It was your duty to watch and control your brother while you were on Midgard. Do not think to lie to me to try to spare him,"

"When we arrived on Midgard, Loki was harsh, self-centered, even cruel at times. When he met the mortal he even mistreated her, and she is a mute, disabled," Thor began the story back at the beginning. "That is how you remember him, how he was when you sent him to Midgard, but he has changed, Father, because of her. He is reformed and it is because of her. He loves her as truly as you love mother. It is not a dalliance. She has become his anchor. He was destroyed when she was taken from us. She was tortured for a year while she was kept from us, from him. What would you have done to those responsible were it Mother? Maybe killing those people in that manner was not the wisest decision, but- "

"Why would anyone with the power to hide her from you and Loki keep a disabled mortal?" Odin demanded, cornering Thor into answering questions he'd been avoiding.

"She has powers they thought useful," Thor finally answered, still avoiding telling Odin what those powers were. Odin thought over that, considering the words, and the...possibilities. He seemed to be wondering what powers you could possibly have that would be worth risking Loki's uncontrolled rage. "Father, he is reforming. He is redeemable, he feels and shows love again, he cares for others, and excepting when his love was in extreme mortal danger and torture, considers the consequences of his actions with consideration for those involved. You cannot fault a man for fighting with everything he is and with such lack of restraint to save his love from torture. I have not seen him the way he is with Y/N since we were children. Do not separate them. Neither of them deserve it, and it will not help Loki if you do. He has made so much progress, Father, please, do not take that from any of us. I finally have my brother back after all of these years." Thor's impassioned speech drew such a proud, pleased look from Frigga, though she remained silent. Loki's expression softened touched by Thor's defense of him, after everything, Thor still loved him.

Odin looked thoughtful, but his gaze was far way, almost, almost as if he were seeing the future too.

*

Loki was standing in front of Odin again, in chains, but no gag this time. "My verdict is this. I cannot allow you to return to Midgard. You cause war, chaos, and destruction wherever you go and I cannot unleash that against the defenseless mortals. Not again,"

"Father, no!" Thor protested while Loki stood silently, stoically, hatred for Odin in ever fiber of his being. Frigga watched helplessly.

"You will return to your previous sentence, spending the rest of your days in the dungeons. You will never see your mortal, or Frigga again,"

Loki's expression fell, tears in his eyes. "All-father, please, reconsider-" he started.

Odin glared. "This matter is resolved. Guards, take him!"

Loki turned frantically to Thor. "Thor, take care of her. Promise me! Please, Brother, promise me you'll look after her!" he struggled against the guards and wouldn't submit until Thor made the promise, until Thor promised that he would take care of you.

*

The scene changed and you saw the path you had to take to help, what future had to come next, if there was to be any hope of saving him. There was only one way and you would have to move fast as soon as Thor returned. You couldn't, wouldn't let Loki be locked away forever for the crime of saving your life.

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