Together forever??

forever broken

Sorry guys but I'm gonna add a trigger warnings for rape and self harm with also thoughts of suicide but I will put in when it starts and when it ends ok loves. Thank you for reading and I know Its been really long time since I've updated.

Alec P.O.V.

Today is the day I will tell magnus just how I feel about him but I have to let him know of my past first. As much as it pains me to tell him I need to get the weight of it off my shoulders.

I get of the couch and walk to the kitchen to make food for me and Magnus I want to make something simple in case I mess up. As I start making food I get lost in thought about how I will tell him and what will be his reaction.

I feel a sudden presence and as i turn around I see glitter it's magnus looking perfect and breathtaking as always. His eyes look at me with concern.

"Are you ok Alexander?"

"I'm fine magnus I just have a lot on my mind that's all."

"It seems like your not telling me everything, I'm your friend I want to help you please let me help you."

That word stung like if a knife had been staged through my heart " friend " i wanted to be more than friends but I can't seem to get her courage to tell him I'm falling in love with him.

"I do need to tell you something but I just need you to promise me you won't interrupt me until I finish ok Magnus."

"Okay my dear Alexander."

"I'm falling for you magnus and I'm afraid..... I'm afraid that you might reject me and if you don't that you will hurt me. I've been hurt in the past and I don't want to go through that again .£trigger warning£  I was with a guy a couple of years ago I was 19 and he was 24 , we were like every couple at first we loved each other so much after two months being together he asked me to move in i wasn't sure at first but he convinced me that it was a good idea and we could spend more time together. So I moved in and after 3 months of living together things went down hill. I remember the moment when I realized that we were not the same. I was making food for him Because he loved when u would make home cooked meals. I did everything he asked of me but when he got home that day he was a little angry so I tried to calm him down but that seem to make him even more mad. He started yelling at me that he wanted to have sex and if I didn't have sex with him he would leave me. So I did have sex with him but he was very gentle it was my first time. He was hard and rough and I tried to tell him to stop but he went harder and harder. At some point I stopped feeling and I don't even remember what happened all I know is that after I went to the restroom to take a shower I looked at my body and I saw a broken person. My body was full of hand prints from where to grabbed me. I saw purple marks on my neck from where he sucked in my skin but the worst was my nipples. Before we moved in with each other I told him how much I loved when people sucked my nipples. But after that day I hated it. When I saw my nipples I saw blood I guess while he fucked me he sucked my nipples so hard they started to bleed and that is what broke me Because he turned something I loved into something I hate. After looking at myself I didn't want to live anymore. I had a razor in a small box under the sink so I grabbed it and looked at it and dragged it down my wrist until I couldn't see it anymore. Until I got dizzy and almost passed out and that's why I'm afraid to get hurt Magnus. £trigger ends£  I'm falling for you magnus and it scares me Because I can't get hurt again Because I love you to much and if you where to hurt me I would still love you."

I watch as magnus gets up a moves..........

Sorry guys gonna end it here I will try to update this upcoming week ok loves hope you guys like it so far.