Acotar and Tog [Discontinued, Will be deleted]

The Darkness Begins to Stare Back

“You and Mor can share tonight - just tell her to shut up if she babbles too much.”

She didn’t laugh. Just stared hard at the door. And I thought maybe she wasn’t the only one preoccupied with my cousin and what was twitching inside that beautiful head of hers downstairs. So I grabbed the knob to my own door, ready to leave her be and ignore the fire for the night, when... nothing. Absolutely nothing except Feyre standing still and quiet, and the bond... pulling taut again. Taut with - with heat .

My hand stilled on the knob. And slowly I turned. And found Feyre’s eyes trailing up my body one piece at a time, lingering here and there, her lips slightly parted.

And her eyes. They filled with that heat, curled and smoked and... considered me. It was one thing, perhaps, not to touch all through dinner. It was now entirely another to allow rooms and walls to separate us.

And we’d flown so close, her skin so comfortably against my neck and hands as my wings had beaten away an ancient storm behind us, that I wondered...

I drew breath to ask her - to ask if my mate would like to join me for the evening. To talk. To sleep. To love. Whatever she wanted - whatever scraps she’d give a despised half-breed of the north.

But as soon as my lips split, Feyre whirled around and disappeared inside her room. The fire inside me dulled into a depressing, needing ache to touch her all the more. Something I was sure some part of her wanted, but with a private room all her own, the option to keep pretending remained too easy to take.

So maybe tomorrow, I wouldn’t give her one. And let come what may.

The scent of rain was refreshing, the cold shower I had needed all night as I tried in vain to sleep. My mind had been too preoccupied with Feyre to bother risking the nightmares and the dreams for another night. She was simply... everywhere now.

Cassian had risen first and opened his door at about the same moment Feyre had opened hers. She must have shaken her head because Cassian’s had shoulders slumped. “When?” he had asked.

“About an hour ago,” Feyre had replied. “She told me not to bother waking you.”

Cassian had politely nodded and closed the door. From where I still laid on my bed, I could see the heaviness weighing him down even as he stared at the door. I wished Az had come. At least Mor would be back by nightfall.

I waited until breakfast was over to tell him Feyre and I wouldn’t be back until the following day. He seemed more concerned with getting out into the rings to push some of the novices around than dealing with our extended absence anyway.

And now, trailing Feyre by several feet through the forests where we’d flown miles from camp and lugging all of our equipment while she teased me with the sway of her hips, I half wished we’d stayed. She was going to drive me up the wall, that fire from the hallway wholly unabated by the rain.

Every step I took, she took another and it felt like my future was in front of me and moving further away at the same time. She kept her mental shields well up, but I could sense her overall mood was pensive, even a tad brooding.

It was only when I’d caught up to her that I realized she had stopped her hike. Her shields were beginning to crack ever so slightly as her thoughts struggled, just enough to let me feel a little more - unusual, given how superb she typically was now at maintaining them. I half wondered if it was intentional, but...

Feyre turned to look at me and I could feel the tension rolling around in her head as she took me in, her eyes trailing over my wings the same way she had last night - with questions - until she met my gaze.