Ambivalence • Jayfeather X Reader •

~Jayfeather X Reader~|9|

  [Y/L/N] frantically sprints around the forest, desperate to find the source of the yowling that sounds oh so familiar. Smelling a mixture of bear and blood,  [Y/L/N] looks down, horrified. "J-Jayfeather...?" Jayfeathers flank heaves up and down with blood pouring out of multiple large wounds of his body, deep enough to look like you could see them on the other side. "Jayfeather!" [Y/L/N]  yowls sadly. Jayfeather turns his head to look at [Y/L/N]  and blinks slowly a few times. "Please don't die, Jayfeather..." [Y/L/N] begs, knowing it would do nothing. Jayfeather uses all of his strength he had in his body to turn his head towards her. "Its my time to go. Goodbye, [Y/L/N]." His eyes go dull, and [Y/L/N] claws the earth and lets out a menacing yowl, not knowing what to. [Y/L/N] weakly collapses next to Jayfeather and tears spill down her F/C facial fur. 

[Y/L/N] wakes up in the middle of the night for the second time, this time knowing what woke her up. Tears spilled town her cheeks again as she remembered his heaving sides and bloody body. Seeing Jayfeather next to her sleeping soundly comforts her slightly.  I'm so glad that was just a dream... [Y/L/N]  buries her muzzle in Jayfeathers fur, not caring if she woke him up or not. Somewhat relieving her, he wakes up for only a second and wraps his tail tighter around [Y/L/N]. [Y/L/N]  prays, begging not to have another nightmare, and goes to sleep again. This time, no nightmares came. 

  [Y/L/N]  wakes up as the sunlight starts to shine into the den, trying her best to shake off the horrible dream she had. She looks at Jayfeather for a few seconds, who was still asleep. [Y/L/N] looks across to Briarlight who was beginning to get up as well. [Y/L/N]  grooms her fur and nudges Jayfeather awake once warriors begin to stir across the camp, bickering to one another quietly. Oh! Its the gathering today!  Jayfeather looks at her confused on why he was woken up, and then also remembers the gathering. He sighs lightly before stepping out of the den, shaking the sleep out of his fur. "Have fun at the gathering" Briarlight calls, before [Y/L/N] joins him. Firestar yowls, waking up the remaining sleeping cats.  He lists [Y/L/N] and other warriors and apprentices to go to the gathering, that [Y/L/N] doesn't know yet. He flicks his tail signaling his clanmates to follow, and [Y/L/N] follows eagerly. She doesn't manage to push aside her anxiety, though. What if the other clans don't like me? Well.. I doubt Firestar would banish me because other clans don't like me... Right? [Y/L/N] forces away her thoughts, and they arrive at an island. There are so many cats! [Y/L/N] pushes away her fear and replaces it with confidence. There's a truce... There's a truce... Steadying her paws, [Y/L/N] sits down next to Lionblaze and a few other cats from her new Clan. Enjoying the happy bickering of the cats of all clans, [Y/L/N] gives her chest a few excited licks.  A young, sleek, golden she-cat with green eyes excitedly sprints over to [Y/L/N]. "I don't recognize you. Who are you? Are you from the clans? Are you even supposed to be here?" Lionblaze forces back his laughter while the apprentice-aged she-cat was pestering [Y/L/N] with questions. Not long after, a dark broad shouldered tom  notices her and immediately catches up to her. "Sleekpaw! You're probably scaring her." he hissed, and Sleekpaw mutters "Sorry. I just don't recognize her." the thick furred tom looks at [Y/L/N] for a moment. "Me either." His gaze darkens questioningly. Sleekpaws nose wrinkles. "Yuck! Tigerheart, she smells like a rougue!" [Y/L/N]  huffs, knowing she was a loner, not a rougue. "Well, I cant say you smell any better." Tigerheart lets out an amused purr. "Firestar will explain me soon." [Y/L/N] meows, trying not to sound frightened by this huge tom. Where did he get those scars? They're NASTY! Before Tigerheart could respond, a massive white tom with black paws and ears brings a yowl across the clearing, and [Y/L/N] guesses it to be one of the clan leaders. Hes bigger than Firestar! That doesn't always mean hes better in battle, though. "I would like to report that Shadowclan has been doing well. Prey is plentiful for us this leaf-bare, which we are thankful for. We thank our ancestors for each bite of prey we have." The Shadowclan leader dips his head towards Firestar, signaling his turn. "Thunderclan has been doing well. Our herbs seem to be growing better than ever." He pauses, gratefully looking towards Jayfeather, and then [Y/L/N]  remembers his herb garden. "We have a new clanmate. This is [Y/L/N]. She was previously a loner, who saved one of our kits from the harsh leaf-bare, R/T/K/N. Without her, the kit would have frozen to death. She took it into her den heroically." Firestar continues. [Y/L/N] flattens her ears, embarrassed, and sees some cats looking doubtfully at her. A muscular brown tabby speaks up. "Typical Firestar to accept rouges into his clan!" [Y/L/N]  sees Squirrelflight glaring at the leader, and Brambleclaw does the same. Squirrelflight immediately stands up, her fur bristling. "Who are you calling a rougue?" Squirrelflight growls angrily. "She saved my kit!" Brambleclaw exclaims. [Y/L/N]  notices Firestar forcing his fur to lay flat, but he silences Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw with a flick of his tail. "My apologies you feel that way, Onestar, but she saved one of our kits. Shes lived the life of a warrior as a loner; she will be welcomed as a warrior." Firestar sends a warning glance to Onestar. A blue-gray she-cat, another leader, [Y/L/N]  guesses,  standing next to Firestar looks at [Y/L/N]  impressively and gives her a warm look in her beautiful blue eyes. "Very well." Onestar says, not seeming to care about anything Firestar has just said. [Y/L/N] believes she can see respect flicker in the massive Shadowclan leaders gaze, but it goes away as quick as it came. "Windclan hasnt had as much herbs as it needs this leaf-bare. One of our elders, {Random elder name}, has died of green-cough." All of the cats in the clearing have grief in their eyes, clearly shaken. Even Firestar dips his head sadly. The blue gray she-cat then speaks up. "I'm extremely sorry to hear that, Onestar. I'm sure she will be very welcome in Starclan." Grief floods her gaze. "Riverclan has had fewer fish, but we're handling it well. Our elder Mosspelt caught a case of whitecough, but Mothwing had enough cat mint to save her."  Respectful glances were cast to a fragile, dappled golden she-cat that was definitely the medicine cat.  [Y/L/N] heard relieved murmurs from the clan cats, glad that two elders didn't die this moon. At the corner of her eye, [Y/L/N] can see a cream furred she-cat glaring at Jayfeather. Almost immediately, [Y/L/N] has a clue of who it is. That cant be... Turning her attention back to the leaders that were already scrambling back to their clans, [Y/L/N] gently shakes her head to clear her thoughts. Firestar begins to walk back to Thunderclan territory with his clanmates at his heels. [Y/L/N] follows, and it starts pouring. Well, at least the snow will melt now. [Y/L/N] glances at Jayfeather, who seemed to be doing well in the rain. [Y/L/N] checks on him again and the rain pours harder. Jayfeather flattens his ears and his senses begin to struggle. He might get mad at me for this. I cant just not help him, though.  As he begins to struggle more,[Y/L/N] steadies him and presses her fur against his side, guiding him gently. Jayfeather growls in protest but begins to relax. 

At last, the clan arrives at their camp. Cherrypaw and Molepaw bound up to [Y/L/N], grinning happily. "We finished your den before it started raining!" Cherrypaw exclaims, clearly proud of herself. "Yeah! We lined it with feathers, too!" Molepaw finishes. [Y/L/N] feels her fur heat up in embarrassment and she flattens her ears back. "I-I really don't deserve that..." Cherrypaws eyes go wide as [Y/L/N] says that. "You saved a kit!" Molepaw looks at [Y/L/N] admiringly. "Yeah! That's a huge favor! Your a hero!" [Y/L/N] flattens her ears back farther, even more embarrassed. "Come on! We'll show you your nest." "Uhhh... Okay. Bye, Jayfeather!" Jayfeather simply nods and disappears into his den, and Cherrypaw shoves [Y/L/N] into the warrior den with Molepaw guarding [Y/L/N] to make sure she doesn't escape, sending out mrrows of laughter.

After Molepaw and Cherrypaw show  [Y/L/N] her den,  [Y/L/N] curls up and goes to sleep along with the other warriors. This is really comfortable, but I already miss Jayfeather. Trying to get her mind off things,  [Y/L/N] tries forcing herself to sleep and she falls asleep easily with nothing but the morning on her mind.

   [Y/L/N]  wakes up in a beautiful, lush green place and she smells a familiar sweet scent near her. "S-Spottedleaf?" The dappled she-cat makes herself visible, calmly stepping towards  [Y/L/N].  [Y/L/N] runs up to her and purrs loudly. "I missed you, Spottedleaf." Spottedleaf responds with a warm glance, as to say the same. "You will become an amazing warrior,  [Y/L/N]. I'm proud of you." A type of grief and confusion sweeps across Spottedleaf's face, but is soon replaced with pride. "It means so much hearing that from you, Spottedleaf..."  [Y/L/N]  murmurs. Spottedleaf dips her head, and begins to fade away.  [Y/L/N]  is disappointed to see her leave so soon, but understands. "Goodbye, Spottedleaf!" she calls before she disappears completely.