1 | Craigslist - Calum

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by fallacioushopes

by fallacioushopes

ADVERTISEMENT: Roommate wanted in LA!
Posted by user: calumh00dz
Uploaded three days ago.

Hey! I'm a twentysomething boy who studies at UCLA but usually spends the days Facebooking and stalking Buzzfeed for inspirational dog articles. I also really, really wish I could be living alone but to live anywhere that isn't a known crack den, I'd have to be making approximately $50k more than I currently do, and SO WE MEET AGAIN, CRAIGSLIST.

The person you'd be replacing is a good mate of mine who got extremely clingy toward his girlfriend of two seconds. Kind of a pain in the ass because we leased this place with the intention of staying for a while but I can't blame him for getting into a clingy relationship (I'm probably gonna anyway). The apt is located on Hillhaven street which I will fail to mention until you're already on your way and need specific directions. It's not actually that close to the subway at all unless you consider the 2nd avenue subway that will be finished in 2023 — then yes, def close to the subway.

It's a converted 2-bedroom apartment so don't get too excited, and yes, you'll definitely be in the converted bedroom. Sure, your bathroom isn't attached to your bedroom but who doesn't love a good walk drenched from the shower into the living room to get their underwear because you forgot to bring it with you? Even better when we have unexpected company, I promise you that. The kitchen is full if you consider a mini-fridge and three cabinets "full" which, in LA, kind of is. Everything is furnished and by furnished I mean came from my mom's basement and/or IKEA clearance and is at least four years old and the couch cushions have been flipped over WAY too many times than is considered hygienic by city ordinance but who's counting, amirite?! Does the kitchen table sometimes break? Yes, but I mean, at least we have a kitchen table. This is Los Angeles. If you're not eating in your living room slash bedroom slash bathroom, you're practically a millionaire so DON'T COMPLAIN TO ME.

Pets are allowed, I got a dog myself, no smoking (this is 4 realz), no drugs (unless it's pot and you're letting me have some too because friendship.)

Your room is big enough to fit a queen bed and that's the end of the sentence. The rent is $900 now but it may increase if (when) they raise our rent for the upcoming year. Utilities definitely come to more than $100 but if I explained to you the unnecessary complexity of my cable package, it would make you immediately not want to live with me, so I will save that for later discussions. We share the kitchen, the bathroom and the living room and you have to hear me play the bass a few times a day.

I promise I'm not a creepy dude, I just really really really need a roommate asap before I get kicked out of my own apartment and have to live with my parents again.

I don't really care if you're a boy or girl, your age or what kind of creepy job you have, as long as you can pay rent I'm good. Text me on my number that can be found down below. I also promise the house isn't as bad as I just described it, I just like a good laugh once in a while.

Calum.