I'm broken (Destiel)

1W 10MM

Dean suckled a glass of whiskey at the bar, feeling like the last week had been a fever dream. Time felt like a thick jelly and his own chest struggled to move up and down under the weight of all that had been burdening him. To think about what had happened almost collapsed the small dam keeping his together. His support, his love, his universe had gone. So many songs made it seem easy to hate the love of his life, to forget about them like a lost cause, but he found that people who were able to say that may not have been in love in the first place. 

He and Cas were two sides of the same coin, complimentary and completely necessary, the way color makes canvas shine, the way canvas gives color a little extra glory. Despite what songs might tell you, you are whole without someone else. But dean was quickly starting to realize that Castiel was the glitter that made him a little more important. He was slowly running out of metaphors to summarize their love, to put it into terms basic enough so that he could contruct a way out of what ever mess his emotions were. He knew he had to shut the door and never look back.

He didn't wanna see their love as a stain, in fact he didn't want to see it at all. He needed to get rid of the idea that he was built for anything more than being a soldier. A perfect stone figure, driven not by Emotion but by logic and order. He had to be the strong one. Who was he to ever think that maybe he could be anything more than the lone hunter that caused 10 more problems by saving the world from one. 

An old woman shook him from his thoughts, sitting next to him on the bar stool beside him. Dean couldn't help but be captivated by the tattoo on her wrist. "1W 10MM". They we'rent Roman numerals so they couldn't be a birthday. Dean stared at her wrist till she spoke, "what? You've never seen a grandma with a tattoo before?" Dean chuckled,

"Nah, I'm just wondering what it means. It's not a date, is it?" She shook her head slowly. 

"This is Pete." She said simply. Dean cocked his head to the side a bit, confused. 

"You makes yor tatto?" The woman laughed a hearty laugh. 

"Hello no. That's just who it stands for. Pete. My late husband." She motioned for 2 beers before continuing. "Ya see, when I was a little younger than you, my everything was named Pete. Hell of a guy. Gave me everything I could've dreamed of. Then came the day when he died. I think I died too a little that way. I kept on looking for a way to summarize it like another file to store away in my mind, then I remembered something Pete used to say. Love was infinite and couldn't be turned into one thing. That's why they'res so many more words for it. 1w 1Mm means: one word 1 million meanings. That's what love was. That's what Pete was to me. You gotta stop looking for a way to file some things away and start looking for ways to embrace and accept them. You have a nice day sir." And with that, she left .

Dean came back to the bunker that night with a new tattoo on his wrist. Guess what it said.