Let Go (JUNGKOOK X READER)

I'm Sorry, I Have To Go

Its been 5 years since i left korea and start studying in japan. And today is my graduation, finally i can start my carrier as a doctor. "Lets take a picture y/n-a!!" Momo grabbed my hand and pull me to her and her boyfriend take it for us, i laugh and pinch her arm slightly "aw! That hurts" she said laughing "hehehe sorry" "soo y/n, will u go back to your hometown while we had our holiday?" "I dont know, probably yes..but..i'm not ready.." I smile at her "ahh.. Because of that man? You're still not over him yet?" I shakes my head "i dont know..probably not..or am i?" I laugh while looking at her and at the distance. 

Days past, i dont know what to do at home, so sometimes i just walk around the garden near my house, helping the elder to do their work etc. "should i just go back to korea for a couple of days?" I ask myself. "Yes, you should.." Mom approach me from afar "ommaa!!" I run to her and hug her, help her with her groceries. "Its been 5 years since you're out of korea, you must miss them." I smile while looking at the road "yeah, i miss them. I miss him.." Mom poke my arm "i thought you're over him already.. Visit him when you're there, he must be missing you too" "no, he probably hates me.and besides, i dont wanna disturb his life too..i'm trying to close my heart for him, and..it kinda succeed." I giggle "then you will have no worries" i nod slowly at her words "i probably am ready to face him."

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"I'll be back for a couple of days mom, take care" i said waving at her while entering the ticker checking. I take a deep breath and get in the plane.

A few hours past and the announcer said "we will now be landing in a moment. Please fasten your seatbelt" i look out of the window and smile "hello korea, its been awhile.." I get out of the plane, and stepping my foot there after long years, i take a deep breath and smile looking at my surroundings.

I take a cab and head to my house. Taking out my key and open my house's door, looking every corner, looking at so many things that brings back my past memories, smile slips my lips. I head back to my room, and see that everything is still on its place, the same place at the day i left this house and start my new life. I lay on my bed staring at the ceiling, "how are you now?" Thinking of jungkook.

I take out my phone from my pocket and unblocking all jungkook's accounts and number. Notifications and messages keeps coming up, i read through it and feel so bad about what i did to him. Leaving him just like that with the words "i love you" as the last words i said to him. I bet it left him hanging. But its okay. I know i cant face the reality but at least that was the very best i can gave him.

I dialed his number and it took him long enough to answer "....." Silence is on the opposite site "jungkook-a?.. You there?" Still no answer, i look at my phone and see that its connected "jungkook-a..answer me.." Still no answer, but i can hear his breath "jungkook-a..i know you're mad at me..i know what i did is wrong..but there are reasons for me doing this..so..i hope you can understand.." Still no answer "i'm in korea now..i just arrived..and i'm home..are you at home? Do you want me to visit you?" Still no answer and i take a deep breath "okay..i'll come to your house..wait for me..." I hang up. When i'm about to exit the door of my house, i see him, standing in front the door step, furrowed his eyebrows and looking pissed, sad, disappointed, i giggle awkwardly "h-heyyy..there you are" closing the door behind me.

I look at his eyes, tears are filling his eyes now and that made me feel so bad "jungkook-a..i-im sor.." Before i could finish my words he pull me and hug me so tight i cannot breath "j-jungkook-a..." "I..hate you" he mumbles on my neck "i hate you..i really hate you..how could you do this to me.." His voice cracking, i close my eyes and hold his shirt on his waist 'calm down y/n...calm down...you cannot...' I said to my self, i open my eyes and try to smile, laying one hand on his head and stroking his hair slowly "i'm sorry..i had to..but i promise i wont leave you again..im sorry.." I kiss his head slightly, his hug getting tighter "i-i cant breath jungkook-a~.." "U promise u wont leave me again?.." I nod and he loosen his grip and pull himself from me looking at my eyes with his teary eyes, i giggle and wipe his tears "u cry???~" i tease him "who doesnt?! Aisshh!" I giggle "nee~ i'm sorryy..aigooo my jungkookie is sad" he pouts his lips. I just stand there and giggle. "So where have you been for the past 5 years. You don't know how much i struggle without you" he look at me stern eating his ice cream "well, i moved to japan to study medicine" "but you havent finished your high school yet" "they provide special offers so, yeah,," i look down playing with my ice cream "where's...that girl?..Yerim?" "Hm? She's home..we moved in together a month after you left. i had mental break down, she was there to calm me down after i lost you. So.." My heart felt like it has been stabbed with a knife, i try to smile and giggle "lost?? ahh..i see" "you wanna see her?" I shakes my head "no, its alright, i need to go back to japan tomorrow anyway" "you promised u wont leave me again, and you'll leave" "i did. I promise i wont leave you, but i'm not promising i'll stay beside you." That words just slipped out my mouth, i close my eyes and take a deep breath "sorry, i need to go jungkook-a..thanks for today. And i'm sorry.. See you tomorrow" just like that i left him there. "You stupid ass bitch! Why would u say something like that? I know ur heart broken but that doesnt mean you have to hurt him!" I keep hitting my head like a stupid girl on my way to my house.