Divided We Will Fall

We Share The Same Flaw

    The rest of the day was a test of Sherlock's loyalties, and a battle raged on centrally in his brain instead of on the battle field. For he knew that this information would be vital for the rebellion and if he gave it away it could increase the response of the militia and therefore increase the bloodshed. Both armies would arrive ready to fight, they would both arrive with proper cannons and weapons...both sides would face heavy losses. Was Sherlock ready to be in control of the men's fate like that, go against the soldiers who he would miss dearly in return to save the lives of American strangers? It was a responsibility he didn't want to hold, it was a battle of loyalties that he didn't want to fight right now, and it was a decision that was beginning to tear him apart. Sherlock had a math exam for his lessons today, just to see how he was coming along with his studies. Now if such a thing wasn't impossible already due to his lack of preparation and sleep, well it was now with his brain off somewhere else! Off with the soldiers, wherever they all went to meet General Gage. That man had taken control of Boston and was he spark that lit the fuse, in the end. He enforced terrible rules, ones the colonists simply refused to follow, and was now seemingly trying to march on and begin the battle that was destined to rage on for years to come. And the news that he was back in Boston, ready to begin collecting his army, well that was bad news indeed. It meant that this war that Sherlock had hoped would never get jump started had just been given a great big push, and was now just moments away from roaring into a great big uncontrollable flame. A flame that would undoubtedly claim many lives, lives that Sherlock would give anything to protect, if he only could.
"William I'm disappointed in you, what terrible test scores these are!" Mrs. Holmes exclaimed miserably, standing with her red inked pen and making quite a lot of marks all over Sherlock's recently submitted math exam.
"I'm sorry Mother, I simply can't concentrate today." Sherlock admitted truthfully. And how could he be expected to, considering his romantic life, his friends' treachery, and now the promise of war! Mathematics seemed very unimportant right now, and even King's College seemed incredibly far way. It seemed insignificant, when compared to such things as life and death.
"Well I hope you can come up with a better excuse than that, because I know you can do better than this. Even with half a brain I know you could do better than this." Mrs. Holmes growled. Sherlock sighed heavily, nodding his head and rubbing his eyes in frustration, wondering if he should tell his mother what was so often plaguing his thoughts at the moment. Oh how tempted he was to tell her everything, just so that he could confide in someone other than Molly Hooper. And besides, Molly wouldn't even be a good applicant for knowing everything, considering she might use some information to better the militia. Now the facts needed to be spread throughout Sherlock's loyalist family and his rebellious friends, no one these days could know everything. Except for him, it would seem.
"I'll study next time, there's just so much on my mind. Could you possibly spare me that test? Let me retake it tomorrow?" Sherlock suggested with a pouting little face, so as to better attempt to forget that disaster of a test permanently. Mrs. Holmes sighed heavily, shaking her head in exasperation but finally nodding along.
"Fine, I'll rewrite something for you tomorrow. But until then, you have homework. I want you to perfect this test; I want all the correct answers. If not, William, I'll be counting it on your record." Mrs. Holmes warned.
"Yes, yes that's quite alright, mother, quite alright." Sherlock agreed with a quick nod, grabbing the old test from his mother's hands and giving her a kiss on the cheek just to show his appreciation. Mrs. Holmes always loved flattery, and so she blushed like a happy old mother and shooed him away in mock annoyance.
"Now come on William, what has gotten into you these days?" Mrs. Holmes whined with a giggle. Sherlock just hopped back and clutched the paper to his chest, feeling quite like a lovesick girl as he thought about his dreamy boyfriend who was now standing in General Gage's attention.
"Oh just...just life, Mother. Proper life, too, not just some hallow recreation." Sherlock assured, nearly bouncing up and down in excitement.
"What on earth do you mean by that?" Mrs. Holmes laughed, shaking her head and staring at her son as if she was seeing him in an entirely new light. Sherlock sighed heavily, millions of different thoughts rushing through his head. There were voices telling him to confess, voices telling him to be silent and hope for the best. Oh yes, voices upon voices in his head, none of them sending anything like reason! None of them sounding even remotely tempting. And so Sherlock just went with his gut feeling, knowing that if anyone would understand at least part of what he was swooning over, it would be his mother.
"I've fallen in love." He admitted with a sway, and with that he bounced about the room and out the door, running away before his mother could track him down and demand more answers. Not that she would get any more answers, anyway. Sherlock would keep the details to himself, and share only the fact that his heart had finally given way to the proper forces of nature. Sherlock escaped the house before his mother could find him, and he could just feel the realization of last night seeping into his very soul and putting a skip in his step. All the way there he whistled a tune and skipped on down the road, he smiled at passerby and even stole a blooming spring flower to put in his button hole. He was feeling properly ecstatic, feeling now not the agony of love but the happiness of it all. The success of mutual admiration, and the promise of more on the way! How had he not known of this feeling before, and to think that he had been hurting with the pains of rejection so long before! To think he would sit in the darkness, longing for something he thought would never be! Well when will it be? Tonight, tomorrow night, a week from now, a month? How long would Victor be here, and did he share Sherlock's anxiousness? Oh Sherlock was just riding this wave of emotion, and he wanted to take it as far as possible. The more firsts he could achieve in the least amount of time would prove to keep him happy for longer, and if coupled with his first kiss came his first night, all within twenty four hours, well that would prove to be the peak of his excitement! Sherlock was sure he would never feel so happy, never feel so satisfied! It would be perfect; it would be just what he had been wishing for.
"Sherlock my goodness, you look like a psychopath!" Molly exclaimed, the first thing she could manage when she noticed Sherlock's obnoxious smile through the crowds of the Boston streets.
"Why, because I'm happy?" Sherlock wondered with a breath of enthusiasm, sitting down on the bench in a great excited huff.
"Because you're smiling to yourself, no one does that unless they're crazy." Molly warned, however Sherlock just took a great big breath and shrugged his shoulders carelessly.
"Well then maybe I am crazy, who knows? Maybe I've gone mad." Sherlock suggested.
"It happened, didn't it?" Molly wondered happily.
"Oh yes, yes a lot of things happened since I last saw you. So many things, some of them wonderful, some of them...not." Sherlock admitted with a groan.
"Well let's start with the good news, and go from there." Molly suggested, looking eagerly at her friend so as to try to get as much information out of him as she could.
"Oh yes, the good news, the best news of all, Molly I'm simply writhing in excitement! And to think of what might come tonight, it might be the very best night of my life." Sherlock promised, squirming in his seat so that he could sit up on the arm rest so as to get the perfect view of Molly in his enthusiasm. She just laughed, knowing now not to try to pop the bubble of happiness he was engulfed in, and nodded along patiently.
"So he kissed you?" she presumed in a quiet voice, for as excited as they both were they had to remember that there were still onlookers, and those who could be listening in as they passed.
"No, no, quite the other way around!" Sherlock exclaimed.
"You kissed him?" Molly gasped, going immediately to cover her heart to show her surprise. She really was a woman when she did that, it was the exact same motion Sherlock's mother made, and Mrs. Hudson of course, when they got excited or scared. Poor Molly Hooper, she would be fifty by the time she was twenty if she kept on aging this way in spirit.
"Yes, yes I did. Abruptly, too, because he was going on about more poetry and I was just so set to make that night the night to change it all. And I was a terrible kisser, I really was, yet when I pulled away he leaned in, and he was much better. He taught me a little something or other about kissing, too." Sherlock said proudly.
"About kissing? Ew, that's sort of..."
"Did you know you're supposed to stick your tongue in the other person's mouth?" Sherlock pointed out eagerly.
"Ew! Oh Sherlock don't tell me that, that's so...unhygienic!" Molly gasped in disgust.
"Well it's true." Sherlock muttered proudly. "I would know."
"That can't be enjoyable, it really can't be." Molly grumbled, pouting a little bit as if she was now worried about how disgusting her first kiss might turn out to be.
"It's something to get used to, I guess. At first I had no idea what was going on, because it's not really something you feel every day. It might be something I could come to enjoy, however." Sherlock decided with a shrug. He honestly didn't know how he felt of Victor's curious ways of kissing, however so long as if was Victor who was kissing him he really couldn't be bothered with it. Sherlock was quite sure that he would do most anything, so long as Victor was directly or romantically involved.
"So what now? Are you two together?" Molly asked, obviously trying to change the topic of conversation as quickly as she could manage.
"Oh, like...well I'm not sure, really. He didn't say anything to make it sound official, yet I can only imagine it has to be something. He acted as if he had been waiting for that chance, and if he had been waiting as long as I have, and if he feels the same way I do...well then I can only imagine that he'd want to stay with me." Sherlock admitted with a grin.
"I agree, well who wouldn't want to stay with you?" Moly agreed with a grin "I'm proud of you, Sherlock."
"Yes but this is only the beginning, a kiss is one thing, but there's something much more permanent that would seal the deal. Something that would make me completely certain he loves me." Sherlock pointed out eagerly, practically trembling in excitement. Molly, however, looked completely blank.
"A wedding?" she suggested nervously. Sherlock just shook his head, his feet tapping against the chair as Molly's face still wore an annoying blank look.
"No, no Molly. Come on, don't make me say it." Sherlock insisted with a whine, smiling all the same.
"So you're not going to get married, and you've already kissed..." Molly's face fell in stark realization, and suddenly she didn't look too excited at all. Suddenly she looked almost fearful.
"There you go; I think you've got it now." Sherlock agreed excitedly.
"Sherlock, oh my god that's something completely...no way! You're too young to be doing that, besides; you're not allowed to do such horrible things until after you're married." Molly pointed out anxiously, squirming in discomfort as her face screwed up in horror. She really didn't like to think of such things; that was obvious.
"I'm eighteen, Molly, I'm a legal adult. And besides, we can't get married because we're not allowed to. And if there's no wedding, well that means we get out of jail free pass. Or a get into bed free pass." Sherlock chuckled, to which Molly lashed out and smacked his legs with her handbag.
"Sherlock you'll get pregnant!" She exclaimed horrifically.
"I'm a MAN!" Sherlock responded just as loudly, this time attracting a little bit of attention from the crowds. He saw some curious heads turn, and with that he sort of slouched over so as to not make such a big scene. It was almost embarrassing that he had to try to talk Molly into seeing his side of things, however he knew that if she was still stubborn then he would have to go on without her approval. Sherlock was in no mood to wait around for everyone to give him the okay before he made his own decisions.
"I don't like you doing that, Sherlock you're trying to grow up too fast. You need to slow down, enjoy the little things." Molly begged quietly, looking quite near tears as she clutched at Sherlock's shin so as to try to clench some sense into him.
"I am enjoying them; don't you see this smile on my face? Besides, there are bigger things to enjoy as well. I'm ready, I've been ready, Molly. And who better to be with for the first time, than that strong, beautiful man?" Sherlock whispered in excitement, sighing heavily like a swooning woman.
"A woman! For God's sake Sherlock, why can't you just..." Molly breathed a heavy breath of emotion, shaking her head before ducking it lower in shame. "Why can't you just be normal?" Sherlock blinked, trying to process that Molly had just said such a thing. For a moment he didn't think she was capable of such insolent behavior, yet no...he was certain he had heard that come from her lips.
"I can't believe I'm hearing this." Sherlock muttered, legitimately taken aback by Molly's claims. He felt as though his bubble of exhilaration had popped, and Molly was the one now holding the pin. Yet she took a heavy breath, nodding so as to tell him she still stood by her words. It obviously pained her to say such things; however she looked as though she was going to say them anyway.
"Sherlock, don't you know that this is all forbidden by God? Not just by the laws, but by the Bible...it's not right. It's fine to have a crush, I mean I'm sure plenty of people get those sort of thoughts, but now you're saying you want to...you want to spend a night with him? It's just...Sherlock you'll end up in Hell for this." Molly whispered fearfully. "And I don't want to see you suffer."
"Don't you think, Molly, that if God really forbade such things that he would have created me this way? Don't you think that if he wasn't happy with two men falling in love that he wouldn't have even sent us down such temptations in the first place? When I fell in love I thought that I was a mistake, an abomination, but think Molly! Everyone has their soulmate, and for a match to happen properly there has to be at least two people who are likeminded. Victor and I, by some miracle, both have the same flaw. Or maybe it's not a flaw, maybe it's intentional. An odd pairing, two odd hearts that make a whole. Who knows his intentions, but I know there had to be reasoning behind it. We would not be feeling these things if it was wrong, we would not be in love if God did not intend it to be so! A match made in Heaven, Molly, no matter how unorthodox it may be!" Sherlock exclaimed, grabbing at Molly's hands and holding her fingers inside of his so that she might feel the crushing weight of his enthusiasm. Molly just sighed heavily, shaking her head as if she simply didn't want to believe what he was saying. As if she didn't know how to handle such chattering.
"I don't know what to say." She admitted quietly. "I'm just scared for you, now and in the afterlife."
"I'll be fine in both, Molly. I'm always fine; it's sort of my talent. And besides, if worse comes to worse, I'll always have Victor by my side." Sherlock adding quietly. Molly nodded, and Sherlock noticed a tear running down her cheek, carving divots in the makeup that she had applied perfectly this morning. He was tempted to wipe it away, just because that was sort of the gentlemanly thing to do at a time when a woman was crying; however their moment was harshly interrupted by a very awkward clearing of a throat before them.

    "I um, well I hope I'm not interrupting anything." John muttered weakly, watching as the two stared into each other's eyes, holding hands, close to tears. Sherlock sighed heavily, looking towards John with a mocking little grin, the flower hanging rather lopsided in his button hole so that both he and the rose were glaring at John in a very judgmental way.
"Oh no, nothing. Thank you for asking." Sherlock growled, pushing Molly's hands away yet still sitting so that his legs were in the way of John's seat as well. Today he was almost curious as to what a conversation with John would be like, considering Sherlock was now the only one who wasn't spying. Molly was still yet to realize that Sherlock knew of their secret organizations, but oh now that he knew it made perfect sense! No wonder Molly wanted to keep John hanging around so often, no wonder she never pushed him away!
"Because I can leave." John added nervously, pointing off towards the sidewalk as if demonstrating which way he would go. As if the moment had not already been ruined!
"Oh no, no stay please do. I'd like to at least explain such a display, before you go off and tell her father. It is him that you report to, right?" Sherlock presumed, looking up at John with a very innocent face. Molly gasped, looking between them both and once more clutching her hand to her heart.
"You know?" she wondered in a whisper.
"Of course I know, Molly, I know everything." Sherlock warned ominously, shooing her away and keeping his eyes glaring at John distastefully.
"He caught me this morning, taking inventory. Forced the truth out of me. Sorry, Molly." John muttered.
"And speaking of overdue apologies, you owe me one for never telling me that you were spying on me too!" Sherlock exclaimed, snapping his neck back to face Molly in an accusing sort of away. She still had tears on her cheeks, however now she looked quite pale, almost as if she was afraid of Sherlock's possible retaliation.
"I'm sorry! But my father is working a big project now, a weapons delivery, and I thought it best to keep tabs on what the soldiers were doing, what they know, and if they're on edge. I thought that...well I thought I could help. I'm sorry for not telling you, I was just worried..."
"Yes I know, you don't know where my allegiance lies. Well I'm proud to say I am a neutral party, so tell me anything and I won't say a thing." Sherlock promised.
"Well that's at least a relief. I was almost worried you were going to tell Victor." Molly admitted with a little sigh.
"Why on earth would I do that? Sell you out to the gallows, and for what? You take precedence to him, Molly, and you always have." Sherlock assured quietly.
"Then why won't you listen to me when I tell you to just wait? To slow down?" Molly insisted with a frown.
"Oh this again...Because I don't want to, I don't want to slow down! Don't you realize that I might be left behind?" Sherlock whined, hiding his face in his hands so that he could hide the expression of pure annoyance that was now shining through his face.
"It's been one day, Sherlock, it's normal!" Molly exclaimed in an exasperated tone, throwing her hands up in the air as if she couldn't believe she was hearing such a weak argument. In the midst of all of this John was looking back and forth, almost as if such an exchange was something of a tennis match, and the words shot back and forth was the ball. He didn't know who to watch, and most importantly he had no idea what was going on.