The Smeet

The Word

If there was something every parent-human, Irken or otherwise- expected with eagerness was the moment their child uttered their first word. Red was more in-between, though. 

You can't blame really him. As mentioned before, this new 'looking after your offspring yourself'' thing was entirely new to him. He loved Ilk but at the same time she was driving him-and everyone else in the ship-nuts, to put it simply.

He stopped himself before even thinking of comparing her to Zim, however. That never. His cute, innocent little Ilk would never be something like Zim. No sir, not as long as he was the Tallest!

Anyway, putting the topic of Zim aside, Red knew he had gotten attached to Ilk from that first moment he held her close and she had smiled at him. It was a strange feeling in his squeedily spooch... The only two Irkens that had made him feel any sort of genuine love/affection thingy were Purple and... Miyuki...

Damn it, even coming close to remembering her made his squeedily spooch squirm in pain.

Still, those type of feelings were usually foreign to a smeetery-born Irken. They lacked parent figures to display and teach affection, and PAK programming usually pushed aside or completely repressed said feelings to prevent them from hindering the soldier's efficiency in combat.

There were other emotions, such as loyalty and camaraderie, that were moderately allowed. Such an example was the case with Red and Purple's almost brotherly-like relationship and undying loyalty to each other, even though they had quite... strange ways of showing it.

It was an almost natural thing on Ilk, however, given that she lacked a PAK programming. Showing concern and interest for Red when he got ill was only the beginning. She displayed affection to him and Purple(much to the latter's delight) openly through hugging and rubbing, and she also showed a certain likeness for certain others, such as Skoodge, Bob and (as ridiculously unbelievable as it sounds) even Zim.

How did this calamity happen? It started with the first word she uttered. That day Purple had been trying to get her to speak after reading about the first word and the importance it had. "Come on, Ilk! Can you say 'Uncle Purple'? I'll give you a donut!"

Ilk merely blinked, staring up at her uncle in confusion.

Red merely stared at the scene, frowning. "Will you leave her alone already? Besides, I forbad you and anybody on this ship to give her any sweets until she's grown up! Especially you."

"Will you get over it? It was a month ago!"

"It's hard to forget when your kid wipes out a third of the Armada and nearly crashlands the Massive against the Conveyor Belt Planet, don't you think?" Not to mention the report they got about a great number of Screwhead slaves escaping on a ship, presumably that silver-colored cargo that flew past them during Ilk's... playtime. He started wishing it had crashed against the Massive.

"Come on, she ought to start talking soon and I want her first word to be her favorite uncle!"

Red rolled his eyes. "First of all, you're her only uncle. Second, I'm her father, so naturally her first word will be me."

Purple smirked. "Wanna bet?"

Ilk merely watched the exchange, her eyes ever curious.

"Fine. I bet half of my personal doughnut supply that I will be her first word." That surprised Red. Purple's own doughnut supply was sacred; nobody(not even Red) but him was allowed to touch it. They weren't ordinary donuts either; they were of a very limited edition that included all of Purple's favorite flavors. The fact he was willing to risk half of it was a bit intimidating.