I Used A Short Story Generator

Excuse Random Genorator

My foreign dignitary had paper cut and I found the corpse of your long lost father in the road

I'm sorry I didn't punch a thousand kittens right in the face,

I was just on the way to the animal shelter when I heard news from the voice in my head named Pablo that all the kittens mysteriously died of the flu.

I decided to punch a thousand kittens right in the face anyway, as you are important to me and I feel we've really made a connection, but then I heard from my doctor that my foreign dignitary had been taken to the hospital, suffering from paper cut. Even then, I still tried to punch a thousand kittens right in the face, but I was just about to contact you when my president called, having heard about my foreign dignitary and wanting to check I was okay.

My president said, "I know you want to do the right thing by this loser, but your foreign dignitary is in hospital and might not last the night."

Gutted, I went to the hospital and sat with my foreign dignitary for a bit. I guess I must have talked about you a lot, because my foreign dignitary looked at me and whispered, "This loser is special, you need to nurture this."

So I said my goodbyes - it was a bit tear jerking, but I got through it, keeping your winning smile at the forefront of my mind - and left the hospital so that I could punch a thousand kittens right in the face, but to my surprise, I saw the corpse of your long lost father lying in the road. I stopped to help, naturally.

By the time I got away, it was almost midnight. I don't like to blow my own trumpet, but I like to think I saved that the corpse of your long lost father. I only hope it's not at the expense of our friendship.

So I'm sorry I didn't punch a thousand kittens right in the face. I hope you won't kick off when I'm in such a fragile state, worried for my foreign dignitary's life. What do you think? Can you give an old fool another chance?

Love from
Lil BrenBren