Green and blue hydrangeas

CHAPTER 6

Ben stood in front of his bathroom mirror, inspecting his neck to see if his marks had shifted. From what he could tell, nothing changed. They were still black and camouflaged by his long hair and well maintained beard. Ben sighed and shivered at the thought of what he'd done. He'd saved Al's life, sure, but he also caused him a panic attack, caused him to relive years of pain. If Alto found out, he'd be in a coffin the next day. Ben took a deep breath, this would just have to be another secret for him to keep. He was going to go to bed and forget this happened, ignore the fact that he and Clef were soulmates, and go on with his life. That line of thinking worked for three days. After Clef came back from leave, Ben couldn't stop thinking about him. He felt like a kid with a crush. Whenever he came by, Ben's heart fluttered. Any compliments made him blush. Clef giving him a hug made his soul leave his body and left him incapable of speaking English for an hour. Ben was head over heels and getting worse. Now, he coughed up stems and leaves along with flowers. A whole head came up at one point. Breathing took more effort. His chest always felt compressed. He kept having fits at work. He hid whatever came of them in a desk drawer, praying no one would see. Especially Clef. It was less him finding out and more him worrying or grieving that obliged Ben to hide his sickness. He couldn't bear to put anymore pain on Clef than he already had. It would be too much. So for the time being, Ben ignored it, Clef's mark, his illness, everything. He pretended nothing had changed since the kiss.

Friday nights went back to normal, hopping between each other's houses, making dinner, the usual. This friday was at Al's. They were watching something called A Christmas Horror Story. Ben was relaxing on the well worn couch, waiting for the meatloaf to finish cooking. Alto plopped down next to him, stretching out like a cat. He laid his head on Ben's chest, right above his hammering heart. Ben let out a rough cough, wheezing for a few minutes afterward.

Alto stood, facing him. "Alright, that's it. What the hell've you got, what's making you so sick? Is it pneumonia again? I can get you some antibiotics."

"I'm fine." Ben coughed out.

"No. You. Aren't. Ben, buddy, you can tell me when you're sick." Alto said softly, looking him in the eye.

Ben looked away and sighed. He looked back into Alto's handsome eyes and admitted defeat. "Yeah, I'm sick."

"There we go, I'll schedule a doctors appointment for you after the movie. Okay?"

"Fine."

The oven beeped, snagging Altos attention. "Oh hell yeah!" He exclaimed, jumping up to get it.

Ben watched as he waltzed back into the kitchen. He scolded himself for giving in to Al's puppy dog eyes. Al came back in, humming and carrying two plates. Once again, he plopped down next to Ben. They started the movie and ate, the meatloaf ended up being pretty good and the movie was halfway decent this time around. At some point, Alto jabbed his elbow into Ben's side and cracked a joke. Ben jabbed back. This led to a poke fight that turned into a roughhousing match. Both were cackling with laughter, ignoring the movie in favor of horsing around. Alto put up a good fight. He managed to get a few hits on Ben but was no match as he beat him in strength. He ended the match by pinning Alto down on the couch. Out of breath, laughing, sweaty, Ben looked down at Alto. He looked back, a grin plastered on his face. The tips of Ben's hair curled around his face grazing his cheeks.

"How's it feel to be a sore loser?" Ben teased.

"How's it feel to be a peice of shit?" Alto spat back.

Ben huffed a laugh, shifting to a more comfortable position. When he looked back however, Alto had gone pale, looking terrified and nauseous. Ben stopped smiling, immediately jumping up from his position over Alto. He'd obviously triggered a memory. He felt his chest swell with guilt. Alto pulled himself up and sat there silent. The only sounds in the room being his heavy breathing and the TV. A few long moments passed before color returned to his cheeks and he'd calmed down.