Catch Me When I Fall

Chapter 14: Dazed and confused!

I was fuming mad. " You said that I broke you. You said that I was all you cared about. Right?" I said though the anger coursing though my veins.
" Yes..." He said hesitant.

" Well and you sent Megan to break my heart because I had yours. But why was Veronica so much in a hurry to get me outta Tanks life if it was you she wanted?" I say scratching the back of my neck trying to figure it all out.

" What are you talking about Rae ?" He said acting oblivious to my question. I don't know how I knew he was lying but I could feel it in the pit of my stomach so I smacked him in the back of his head hard.
" Ouch... Ok... Yes I did do that. And Veronica did it because I promised if she'd do it that you'd leave her alone and we could date. Her and I. Damn Rae." He said rubbing his head.

" And when I got my memory back why didn't you tell me then?" I said still flaming from the ears.

" I wanted you to remember him as the one who hurt you. I knew I fucked up because you truly wanted me. And I fucked that up and then you waltz back in to my life and I saw you with Tank and I flipped how could you just fall back in to Tank and Rae like shit never happened then you remembered him hurting you and me hurting you. I just couldn't risk losing you to him again." He said dropping his head.
" You didn't lose me to him. Because honestly it was always him. I was just to blind to see it." I said in my realization. I stand there in deep thought and I totally didn't mean to say that. But it seems right. Maybe my life was supposed to come to this and now realizing that my dreams were about Silas as the young boy but I also know the older boy was Tank because it was supposed to be Tank all alone. I was on the verge of a break through when I heard.

" Great. You can't see past him. Never been able to. Do you remember my one condition to us dating back then?" He snapped me outta my Head.

" Yeah... You said if I would tell Tank I couldn't see or talk to him anymore we'd be boyfriend girlfriend." I said.

" And you said you couldn't do that to him. I knew you loved him from then on so yes I broke your heart to spare mine." He said angry now.

" You broke broke my heart twice because you broke it the first time turning me down and the next was the most pain I've ever felt. He ment so much to me Si I truly loved him and you caused that heartache. Go to hell. " I said getting up and running out of the band room.

Entering history I passed Colt a note. It said I needed to talk after class. I couldn't be with someone when my life is so messed up. I had caught up with Megan the confirm my suspicion. And I left a note for Vee to meet be in the parking lot after school.

After class I am standing waiting on Colt to come out. And Lilly walks up to me.

" You look like you need a night out!" She about shouts.

" Yeah I do. " I say nicely.

" Party at the old pool yard tonight." She says with a smile.

" I'm there." And she walks away and Colt is standing there listening to us. " Thought you were coming to my house tonight?" He said sadly.

" I-i um... I think we need to put a hold on our relationship because some stuff is happening and I need to fix this before I'm ready to invest in you." I said feeling really bad.

" Tank....am I right? Fucking Vee was right... I am playing a losing battle. Have a good life Raelyn. It was fun while it lasted." He said and I'm taken back.

" Veronica... Really Colt. I just found out some stuff that confused me and I don't need that in our way of proceeding this relationship if I am confused. And that's cool I'll have a great time colt. And you don't call or text me if that's the attitude your gonna take."

With that I turn and left to go to the meeting with Veronica whom I was going to apologise to but have different methods in mind now. As I get up to her she's taken back because she was expecting me to be the one who was the one who left the note.

" Jesus what do you want Raelyn?" She said once she came to realization that it was me who sent the note.

" I have a few questions. And I'm not in the mood for lies. Back when we were 13 you talked Megan in to kissing Tank so I saw and she did. You did that to date Si I get it. But why tell Colt that he'd never compare to Tank if you were still in love with Silas and that's why your a big bitch now. Why ruin my relationship with Colt? I was actually coming to tell you Silas is a total douchebag and I was sorry about the past but fuck that your a twisted fuck. I'm done." I snapped and she said.
" Silas and me dated for a year after you left he tried to tell you he missed you and pined for you but he didn't but yeah I do still love him and he still comes to me we still have sex as friends I guess. But Colt I really liked him and he hurt me. He caught me having sex with Silas in the bed and he broke up with me and I came to realization you got Tank and Silas was obsessed with you and now your getting the one guy that I actually liked. But truth be told I don't hate you. It's not your fault. But I sure as hell don't like you though." She said.
" Well me and Colt just broke up so your good there. " I said
." I figured you might. No body stays around you long." She said being a bitch. I punched her in her nose and walked off. Bitch really said that when she single handly ruined my relationship with anyone I care about.
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