The Life of Walking Trauma

1

Being betrayed hurts. Not sleeping because my minds still rejestering whats happened. Sitting there in my bed with a cup of coffee at one in the morning. Needing something to fill the emptiness that I'm feeling. Just wanting to cry but tears don't come because I've already been hurt. Not knowing what to feel when I see the person who betrayed me. Thinking back they've all been the same. Four people who have let me down, breaking a little each time. I'm broken and I can't be fixed. The smile that you see on my face is fake. Behind this mask is a broken little girl. Putting a kid through this pain and sadness but only watching them spiraling into depression. Watching them go crazy day by day until they don't know how to feel or what their feeling. Putting on a fake smile for the only family I have left hurts. Crying alone, dealing with depression alone because no one will help. Wanting it to go away. One by one these people around me will go away or I will start pushing them away because of my madness. And for that I'm sorry but why does life have to be so painful. Why couldn't I stay in my fairy tale a little longer. Why can't I just be a kid and not make these adult decisions already. Someone just end this pain and emptiness in my chest.