Jacob Burns and the Order of the Algorithm #Wattys2017

Chapter 19: The Road to Ruin

We continued to sit quietly for what seemed like forever, Hancock greeting a few people here and there even as Ilya kept her head down and her mouth shut, not having spoken a word since we'd arrived. I could only hope this meant the girl was starting to rethink this whole 'Nuka World' thing after all. Lord knew I wouldn't mind that change of heart right about now...

As Hancock drained the last of what had to be his fourth or fifth beer, I couldn't help but let my mind wander back to what happened only moments ago. Magnolia Labelle... The Magnolia Labelle... I mean, how the hell does something like that even happen? What the hell does he got to offer a celebrity like her that she can't get from someone with more money, more power, and better looks? It just didn't add up, none of it did. I snuck another look at Hancock from the corner of my eye, the booze running down his radiation scars like rivers in a canyon and I shuddered in disgust. I mean, how could anyone, let alone a famous and beautiful singer like Magnolia Labelle, be attracted to... that?

It had to be some sort of trick, it just had to be. He probably paid her to put on the act, just to boost his own ego and put me on edge. As if a thing like that could ever have a chance with her, or any woman for that matter. Yeah, that was it. Had to be. There was just no other explanation, and Magnolia was a performer, after all.

But then again... said an obnoxious little voice in my head, He certainly did seem to have charmed over Ilya awfully fast. She was only just now starting to trust me and I'm the one that broke her out of the vault!

No, I had to stop that. This was exactly what Hancock wanted, to get in my head and make me second guess myself. There was a difference between him and me and that was he was willing to tell her anything she wanted to hear, whereas I told her the truth from the very beginning. It made sense that someone as naive as Ilya would make the mistake of trusting a filthy snake in the grass like him.

"You got something to say there, Burnsie?" Hancock asked as he stared me in the face, snapping me back to reality as I realized how long I must have been glaring at the man.

"Oh! Er, no not really... It's just, uh, well," I hesitated for a moment, struggling to find the right words, "I was wondering... How did you and Miss Labelle meet exactly?"

In an instant, I knew I had made a mistake. His eyes narrowed with glee as a wide smile tugged his mouth into a toothy, self-satisfied grin as he readied to pounce.

Oh, why can't I ever keep my damn mouth shut? I lamented silently to myself, knowing exactly where this was going.

"What's the matter, Burnsie?" He sneered with a smile, "Don't tell me you're feeling jealous of an ugly old ghoul like me? Or maybe you just ain't so sure of yourself now that you know who you're up against? ...Oh, now I get it! You're hoping I can give you some pointers, is that it? Sorry, don't know if I can help you in that department, after all, from what I hear your last relationship kind of crashed and burned, now didn't it? HA!"

"Oh just forget it..." I deflected, but he wasn't about to let me off that easy.

"Aw c'mon, Burnsie!" He prodded some more, "Don't be like that, I mean, I can at least try to give you some advice. Like, say you're out on a date with your favorite gal, or fella, you know I ain't one to judge, Burnsie-boy," he added with a wink, "but I'd avoid going anywhere too stimulating. You know, no gun ranges, nuclear silos, or high-flying combustible blimps... We just wouldn't want you to get too excited and set off a pre-emptive strike, if you get my meaning. There ain't nothing worse than unwanted friendly-fire, after all...

I groaned as Hancock laughed again, several nearby raiders joining in the chorus. I guess Goodneighbor wasn't the only dump to get a copy of Piper's "Special Edition" after all...

I sighed. Figures. All of civilization sees me as a laughing stock, so why wouldn't I be one out here in the wild too?

"Oh, and don't forget the time-" He started again, but I slammed my fists onto the table, startling Ilya out of her daze as I did.

"Alright! Alright!" I yelled, giving him the very reaction he'd been looking for all along, "I get it, goddamnit... Sheesh, I'm sorry I even asked."

I couldn't have been more thankful when at last, Magnolia finally appeared again and approached our table, a frown on her face and her hand on her hip.

"Tell me the good news, sweetheart," Hancock smiled at Magnolia and she sighed.

"Eet wasn't 'eezy, darling, I must tell you. He was quite upset, but I 'ave convinced him to 'ear you out, however, he must insist zat ze beast stay exactly where he iz, as he absolutely will NOT 'ave zat thing in 'is office. His words, darling, not mine. I 'ope you understand."

"Fine enough, doll-face, just lead the way," he replied with another smile and the three of us got up and followed the woman across the room, leaving Fahrenheit to watch over the mutant in the meantime. We weaved in and out of the bustling crowd, the place even more packed now than when we had first arrived (if that was even possible), and eventually, we were led towards a small hallway off to the side of the theatre with a small seating area and a large pair of wooden doors. Hancock rushed to open them first, ushering both Ilya and Magnolia inside before himself, an unusually gentlemanly gesture, at least, so I thought. As soon as Ilya was out of sight, I watched him grab a firm hold of Miss Labelle's derrière, eliciting a squeal of delight from the love-stricken woman.

Hancock looked back at me for a moment and gave another wry wink before walking inside, leaving me alone in the empty hall.

I did my best to shake it all from my mind. After all, there were much more important things to worry about right now, like finding a way into Nuka World without losing our heads and keeping that mad Director off our trail. Besides, there was no real reason to worry about Ilya with Hancock. She may have been a naive little fool right straight out of the dark ages, but I had faith that she was still smart enough to see past Hancock's grade of bullshit. She just needed a little more time to see it.

Even so, as I reached for the door handle I could still hear Hancock's words echoing back from the other night, just as clear yet even more confident than before.

I have a feeling Miss Astor and I are going to be good, good friends soon enough, just you wait and see, Burnsie, just you wait and see...