Today we look into the mystery of why Garfield loves lasagna so much.
First off, let's really get to understand lasagna. Its made from beef, cheese, noodles and maybe other stuff I'm not sure I don't like lasagna I'm not Garfield.
Basically lasagna is just complex spaghetti. Now why would someone want such a complex meal such as lasagna in the first place? That's what we are here to uncover.
I personally do not like lasagna, its to complex for me. Yet I do enjoy meatless spaghetti with lots and lots of parmesan cheese. I have a rule that whenever I eat spaghetti I must watch the Simpsons, but enough about me we're getting off topic.
Back to the mystery of Garfield and his love for complex spaghetti. If you've ever read the Garfield comics or watched the show, you know that john is garfields lasagna maker.
Now let's understand more about john.
Is he Italian?
I'm not sure, they don't make his religion clear in the series.
Why is he so good at making lasagna if he is not Italian?
One word.
Government.
Its always been the government.
You can't trust them.
One day its just ramen noodles, next they're adding sauces and such then we have lasagna what's next!?
Spaghetti tacos or something??
The government genetically modifies food with steroids to make them taste better. So they really fucked with Garfields lasagna so he'd like it a lot and get really fat.
But why did they want this?
I'll tell you.
They needed an icon for people everywhere to relate to. Someone to really get people eating lasagna.
Why did they want them all eating it?
Because they were enhancing it with various chemicals, and one of those chemicals being a brainwashing element.
Now you might be wondering how I have gathered all of this information and you're probably wondering if its accurate or not.
Its accurate, so very accurate.
And you wanna know how I know that?
I'm a government spy.
So that's why Garfield loves lasagna so much.
:-)
