MJ Fantasy- Traveling Soldier

Ch. 11

Opening my eyes I look over at the clock and sigh, “I have to go home.” I inform him propping myself up on my elbows. Jacob frowns. I bite my bottom lip and flop back down on his bed curling into a fetal position on his unmade bedspread. “But I don’t wanna go!” I exclaim as I find Jacob’s hand and place it in mine. He intertwines his fingers and uses a persuasive tone when he asks,

“Why don’t you stay?” I smile and nod my head.

“It’s very tempting, but I cant. I’m grounded remember? My father still doesn’t even know I spent the night with you that day… the day I..”

I trail off too consumed with the emotions that were brought upon me that day. The emotions of grief shock, and deep sadness. Also the thought of that Michael will never get to see his baby boy or girl.

I try to forget that day and pretend like it never happened. Only, it’s very hard when I carry it around with me for the next three months. Watch as my belly and baby grow without it’s father there to see it grow. Without its real father even knowing that this is his baby. That he’s going to be a father.

It’s been 6 months and there is still no sign of him. Police are getting ready to pack up this investigation and leave it as a missing person’s record. Since they’ve started, they were only lucky enough to find 8 of the 14 missing soldiers, yet… none of them were Michael.

At least those 8 soldiers get to go back to their family, their children and their loves. Whereas mine, is gone.

A week after I got the letters back, there was a news report that reported the attack. The entire place looked so destroyed and ruined. After the fire, there was nothing left. Nothing for some families to save and remember their loved ones. A few dead bodies laid face down on the floor, to keep from recognition, but I knew from what they looked like from the back… none of them were Michael’s.

My family was confused about my sadness and tears towards the report, but Jake luckily was there and blamed it on my hormones from the pregnancy. He knew why, but he wasn’t going to say anything about. He only comforted me and tried to keep me calm before I had another breakdown. I stayed in my room, watching the news reports, for some kind of sign. Some kind of notice that Michael is alive and safe. Part of me knows he’s dead, but the other part of me… hopes. Hopes that Michael will return to me, to us. He will return to his baby, to me. I yearn, I wait and I cry. I watch as the days go by and feel helpless and useless. My tears, now seem as if they are shedding for nothing…

Jacob smiles, stands up then helps me off the bed. Once I’m standing he takes both of my hands in his, “I’ve already discussed this with my father and he and I believe that it would be better if… the baby had a mommy and daddy in the same house together. Under the same roof.”

I raise an eyebrow, “What are you saying?” I ask.

“Move in with me. That way if the baby needed us he can have us both under the same roof. He doesn’t have to be transferred back and forth. And I doubt I’m allowed to move into your house. My dad is all for you moving in.” I just stare at Jake trying to process this new information. I always saw Jacob and I being parents, but I never saw us actually living together in the same house. His reasoning does make sense, but I don’t think I can move just yet. I don’t think I’m ready to move out yet, but look at me. I’m 17 years old and pregnant. My father can barely stand to look at me. How will he see me with a baby on my hip in the end? And my brothers… I don’t think they’ll ever let me or my baby out of their sights again. I cant put my baby through that kind of life. I need it tobe loved, to be cared for and not to be blamed of for my actions. Jacob’s family is the only one that doesn’t do that. Jacob’s father, Billy, never treated me like anything, but a human. He treats me as he always had. He never once showed me disappointment or judgment, just like Jacob. Maybe I can move in here…