DIRTY SEXY KINKY BOOK

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THE SEXOIDS FROM THE PLANET HORNIUS

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THE HARDCORE GAY EROTIC ADVENTURES OF FANDANGO DE CLOUD

*Editor's Note - Ya done screwed up big time kid. Ditch the whole chapter and write somethin' my wife an her buncha sex starved middle aged broad friends can jill off ta without pukin up in their mouths! Honestly, what is the obsession with this gay barman character?

*Writer's Reply - Fandango De Cloud is one of my finest creations - his wisdom and homilies guide and encourage characters like Minx and Sebastian, to realize the ultimate fulfillment of their innermost spiritual questing, almost on a Jungian transformative level. Plus his sado-masochistic bondage relationship with his boyfriend, Peurto Rican flamboyant drag queen Juan 'Hetty' Hernandez Dela Vega appeals to the expansive homosexual market that we need so we can get almost every demographic in the masturbatory readership spectrum.

*Editor's Reply - Shut the fuck up wit yer college words, ya cheap hack. Bandwagon Publishing is a family firm guided by pinciples of good ol fashioned moralistic entertainment. Get back to straight sex with plenty of lezzers thrown in.

*Writer's Reply - It's this kind of hetro-normative censorship that is killing romance literature today. There's only 24 hours until this week's chapter deadline and I absolutely one thousand percent refuse to change a single word.

*Editor's Reply - Then yer fired and the ghost writer takes over an the company keeps your $2,000,000 advance cut from the book n film deal we just signed with a major studios

*Writer's Reply - Uh ... naturally I want to continue the fruitful relationship with Bandwagon and am prepared to compromise to a degree and ... well I do have a roughed out Kinkarella scene.

*Editor's Reply - Plenty a fuckin n suckin - nuthin gay. An don't forget ta delete the old chapter title.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THE SEXOIDS FROM THE PLANET HORNIUS

Sebastian looked out upon the crowd - the cream of New York's literati were gathered for his latest reading. The champagne was flowing and old friends and supporters like Bernie Sanders, Minx Von Tease and New York Times columnist and literary critic, David Orr were gathered to give their support.

'Champagne Mr Black?'

Sebastian gratefully accepted the glass from ... 'Fandango, what are you doing here?'

The wise and esteemed barman, who looked a bit like a dark haired version of Sasha Baron Cohen character, Bruno, gave a pout lipped smile of encouragement. 'I got a job for the evening here at the Literary Arts Centre.'

Sebastian sipped his drink, cleared his throat and began.

'Good evening Ladies, Gentlemen, Mr Mayor, President Obama ...as you know I have been working on a work of great literary importance. Today I present my second reading from ... Kinkarella and the Prince. As you'll no doubt remember, after the Prince and Kinkarella got together and liberated his world from the oppressive forces of the merciless Wang, they mounted an off planet expedition in order to find the lost origin and homeworld of Kinkarella. The story picks up some time later ...'

The man was blonde and beautiful, but there was something effette and feminine about his smooth hairless features - he was the polar opposite of the Prince, her lover. He seemed to have no bulge in the front trousal area where the Prince packed a monster veined purple headed love log of epic proportions.

'You are a slut,' stated the man, but his tone was bland and devoid of insult.

Nevertheless Kinkarella's firm and rounded melon like boobs strained out against her flimsy close hugging tight low cut, as she puffed herself out in indignation. 'I beg your pardon!?'