Above clouds (Short stories)

Hold it together

Madness~ Ruelle

She was broken. What she felt inside couldn't be written down. It was as if someone had stepped on her chest squeezing the air inside of her lungs. No matter how hard she tried she couldn't escape the pressure. She was trapped.

The tears she had been keeping in, hiding it from the world for ages, started to sting her eyes threatening to fall.

No. She couldn't give in. The wall she built up through years of hard work couldn't be smashed in just a moment of a second. She couldn't stand that. She won't let it happen.

"Ms. Doyle? Are you alright?" fury dwelled up inside of her like a monster trying to escape her body. But she forcefully pushed it down, determined to not let emotions slip through ruining her surroundings. She firmly nodded.

He locked eyes with her but she looked away denying the empathy shown towards her. He sighed and kept going on knowing she won't let him in no matter how hard he tried.

"Back to our discussion: is the financial part suitable for you?" the man asked.

She indicated her agreement with a small nod again. But her mind wandered off somewhere else.

She gazed outside.

Her eyes reflected the dim light of the sky. The indistinct commotion of the busy city surprisingly seemed to calm her. She kept staring out of the window, memories flashing in front of her eyes. It made her heart shatter into a million pieces. Even if she would at least try to collect all the pieces, nothing could glue them together. Nothing. She could never be fixed.

She roughly shook her head pulling herself back to reality.

She realized she was left alone in the room with only grief for company.

And she greeted it as an old friend.

"We are all united not only in our desire to pay our respects to Lucy but rather in our need to do so..." it was another one of THOSE speeches she utterly despised.

Pushing her way through the crowd in the cemetery she put on her inconspicuous black coat. She stepped out onto a narrow side road when out of nowhere small drops of rain fell on her puffy cheeks. Stopping in her tracks she tilted her had back letting the water stream down her soft skin. She closed her eyes breathing in the cold air of the night. Her body, mind and soul dripping with sorrow.

That night she was lonelier than ever. She knew that loosing Lucy made her abandoned and isolated from the others forever.

Finally those long awaited tears now broke the gate and flowed, submerging her pillows.

Weeks passed by not bringing any relief. Nobody could help her, not one soul. She wasn't herself anymore. The dark circles under her eyes showed no emotion whatsoever, they reflected her soul: she was dead inside.

She was laying on the floor of her small, modest apartment, staring at nothing. Heartbreaking memories flashed in front of her watery eyes. Her perfectly shaped lips swollen due to the biting of it all day. Her breath shaky she whispered into the darkness of the night:

"I wish you were with me"

And she drifted off to sleep.

Next morning a bloodcurdling scream echoed through her skull leaving pain of the worst. She pressed her fingers to her forehead and curled into a ball. She tried to lock out the world but it was no use.

The screeching didn't stop. She couldn't bare the agony it made her feel.

"STOP! PLEASE STOP!" she sobbed begging for mercy. Thrashing around she crawled to the bathroom pushing herself up with the help of the bathtub. She stared at her reflection in the mirror: hair messy and eyes bloodshot. But they were the eyes of someone else she found uncomfortably familiar. She opened the tap and placed her head under it letting the cold water wake her up from this nightmare.

'You can't resist me. I'm here. Just as you wished...' someone whispered in a cold tone making her blood freeze in her veins. She peeked around to find the source of the voice but no one was there. She was completely alone.

'I'm here Steph. With you'

She peered into the mirror looking at the eyes: and finally recognized them.

"Lucy" she murmured more to herself than anyone.

'Yes, dear Stephie. It's me' the voice chuckled. But there was no sign of compassion in it, only bitterness.

Stephanie froze once more.

She looked at her fingers counting them one by one. She got all ten of them but right now that didn't calm her. It only made her more anxious.

'Want to try reading?' But Stephanie didn't move. She couldn't. Lucy had complete control of her body. 'Oh sweetie I'm sorry to disappoint you but this isn't a dream. It's not even a hallucination of your dullard mind but R E A L I T Y.'

Under Lucy's authority Stephanie made her way out of the bathroom heading for the living room.

Steph had a gut feeling about Lucy's intentions and it didn't soothe the fire inside of her.

The room had a huge window facing the Marylebone High Street. It's frame was astonishingly beautiful: it was tree shaped creating the Doyle's family tree going back as far as the Middle Ages. The dead were marked with a small black dot and Stephanie knew that there will be one beside her name in a short period of time.

Determined to not let Lucy see her fear she hissed under her breath:

"Do it. Do it you coward"

She could feel the hesitation of her friend instantly turning into annoyance.

'If that's what you wish'

And they jumped.

Later that day Stephanie Doyle was declared dead and a small black dot was found beside her name.

But looking back she didn't regret it.

She stayed brave facing her biggest fear: death.

And that's what counts eventually.

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