Beyond the Boundaries

Chapter 2

Islamabad, Pakistan 

2012

As she stood in her bathroom holding the blade in her hand and turning it over and over again between her fingers, she glanced at her own reflection in the mirror. She didn't recognize the person staring back at her.

'This isn't me,' she thought to herself, 'because ME, the old me, would have never even thought about doing something like this. The old me would find it disgusting and messed up. How did I let myself come to this?'

It wasn't like she was going to kill herself. She only wanted to cut a little, see a little blood come pouring out of her skin. Maybe the pain of that would overcome the emotional pain she was feeling.

Holding the blade between her fingers, she started to contemplate if she really wanted to do this, if she even had the courage. She pressed the blade to her arm. Just. She pressed again. And then again. No blood came out.

'Am I afraid to do it? Am I not strong enough? My will power isn't that strong. I am a coward, aren't I?' The sudden realization dawned on her. She put the blade down, before gripping the wash basin tightly with both hands, bowed her head, and cried. And cried. Then she washed her face and came out of the bathroom. Like nothing had happened, like she had not been close to slicing her own skin not a few minutes before.

Crying had been a catharsis. She felt calmed. She needed to do something with her life. She went into her room and halted, stopping, suddenly, in her tracks. It was like her whole world had stopped for a second. Something in her head said to start a blog. NEVER before in her life had she ever had a thought about blogging. Nor had she even read any other blog, for that matter. She didn't know from where or why or how that thought had popped into her head, but it was her antidote. She never knew it would save her.

It was as if, in one moment, the idea of a blog was swimming around in her head and in the other moment she was sitting on her laptop surfing on Google, she typed in How to start a blog? Many options came up in her Google search engine. Bloggers Meet Bloggers, caught her attention immediately, as it appeared quite easy to start a blog there. She filled in the necessary information. Finally, there came the difficult task of choosing the blog name, a lot of ideas and names were floating around in her head. Some were already taken by other fellow bloggers while some were not that good. The name Eureka Moment popped into her head. The irony was too good to be true. Just as Eureka had his greatest idea when he came out of bathroom, she had one of her best when she came out after washing her tears and hiding her pain. Voila, a new blog was added to a list of a million other blogs!