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P R O L O G U E

I couldn't breathe properly.

I haven't eaten.

I haven't slept.

I haven't talked to them, even if they talked to me.

I haven't been able to look at them in the eye.

I haven't been able to properly converse with them.

I haven't been able to live.

But I can't tell them anything. They would know if I told them. They would punish them. They would harm them even if I'm doing what they want me to do.

They'd do anything to hurt me.

They'd hurt others just to make me do what they want me to do. Things I never wanted to do. Things that were wrong. Things that hurt others.

Things that hurt me.

"Kyungmi," a voice called out, "your parents are looking for you."

I didn't need to look up to know who it was.

I stood up and I realized that the once boisterous voices had died down. I took a deep breath before looking up and finally had the chance to look at them.

I gave them a small smile, a small fake smile. One I hoped they couldn't look through.

I did seem to be getting better at these artificial smiles, though. They never asked why my eyes were swollen.

Because I had makeup on.

Nor did they ask why my voice would be hoarse at times.

Because I rarely spoke
around them now.

I met each of their eyes before turning away and meeting the man at the door. And as we left, I didn't dare look back.

I couldn't show any sign of weakness, not anymore.

"Being weak is being vulnerable."

"Being weak will always lead to failure. You're not a failure, are you?"

"If you show any sign of weakness, we will destroy the source. No matter what it takes us, do you understand?"

I understood. I understood it perfectly. I understood even more than perfectly.

If I wanted them to be safe, I had to pretend. Even just for a while. Until they say that I can show my emotions, act as if I cared.

But even if they say that, even if they say that I can act as if I cared...

I wouldn't be acting towards my friends.

I'd be acting towards the people who told me to lie.

I'd be acting towards the people who told me to act.

I'd be hiding my true feelings.

I'd be showing them my false feelings.

- - -

"Kyungmi, what have you found out?"

His voice was so cold, so stern, as if he wasn't my father.

I swallowed the lump in my throat.

If I hesitated, if I delayed, if I denied them any information, they would find out that I have a weakness. And that the source of that weakness were the people they were telling me to spy on.

"Subject 087," I started, "he has a strong personality. This leads the other eight to follow him, as if he was their leader. He's the one who takes care of them all. He's hard-working. He's at the top of his class in Math, Science and Literature, meaning he's good with processing and understanding. He speaks English and Korean as of now, he's still learning Japanese and Chinese."

"He's the one who's a year older than you, right?"

I nodded. "Him and subject 088. Subject 088 is different from subject 087. 088's personality is more mellow, it's softer. He's more relaxed and whenever he notices that something is wrong with any of the eight, he asks them and makes sure to know whatever is bothering them. He's the one who came from FG and SM before being given to us, no he isn't infected, we've known that since he arrived, otherwise we wouldn't have taken him in. He speaks Korean and basic English.

"Subject 091 is the one born in the same year as me, 1998. His personality is the most unique one out of all of the others combined. I could say that it's a 4D personality. He sometimes says things at the most random times, but there is no meaning behind them, it's just a word. His stamina is also good since he dances a lot, even though we're just 6. He is ambidextrous, so he can adjust if we give him a job that would require both sides, but he is also afraid of heights. He's a reader, meaning he reads a lot of books. In his free time, he'd always have a book with him. He's similar with 088, he also has a listening ear. He speaks Korean, basic English, and basic Japanese.

"Subject 101 was born in 1999. He may seem as if he is a cold person since he likes dark things, but once you get to know him, you will see that he's one of the softest people. His stamina is also good since he's oddly excellent with all the sports that include ball. He only speaks our language.

"All the 2000 boys, subjects 112, 113, 114, and 115 are still young. I regret to inform you that I have nothing to process about them. All I know is that they are capable, especially 112, who, as from what I see, admires 091 whenever he dances. As for 113, 114, and 115 I do not know yet. The same goes for the youngest one, subject 165, he was born in 2001 so I cannot process him either."

The man in front of me, the man I just exposed my friends to, chuckled.

"You did a good job, Kyungmi." He said as he met my eyes. "We weren't so sure if you would, considering how close you've gotten to them."

I froze. My mouth felt even drier, my throat tightened.

They knew.

He tilted his head and let out a small 'tsk'.

"There is fear in your eyes, child. They are your weakness."

"Father, please— "

"What did I say about weaknesses?"

"Father, I beg of you. Do not harm them in any way. I will not show that I care for them, please father, just do not hurt them!"

He eyed me. "It is true that you haven't shown them that you cared. But you will have to act as if you have to, soon. But soon is not now. Follow me, you need to learn. You must know how to hide your emotions, even the deepest ones. If you do not, I will not hesitate to dispose of you even if you are my own child."

As he turned and started to walk, I didn't hesitate to follow. But I looked back, and for both our sakes, I hoped there were no cameras here.

The man who had escorted me here, Park Jinyoung, Subject 045, had given me a sad look.

And to show emotions in this facility was a crime.