HERA: You little -
HERMES: Now, THIS is the temperature I like my tea to be.
HADES: [ yelling over the commotion ] AND IN TEAM TWO: everyone who wasn't called out.
PERSEPHONE: You can't just do that.
HADES: Well I mean, why not? They know who they are.
PERSEPHONE: Just call the names out.
HADES: Team two: Apollo, Hephaestus, Ares, Athena, Artemis and Dionysus.
ARES AND ATHENA: I'm team captain
PERSEPHONE: Why don't you both be captain?
ATHENA: That's too logical for him
ARES: Actually, I don't mind sharing the position
ZEUS: Hear that, Hera? They share positions.
HERA: If you don't stop talking, you'll share a grave.
PERSEPHONE: Contestants, this is the dish you will be recreating, [ lifts silver dish lid thing to reveal a tomato soup ]
HADES: Ew tomatoes
PERSEPHONE: if the team captains could come up and taste it.
The captains taste the soup and Ares' face turns red and he drops the spoon and coughs into a napkin
ARES: [between choking] It's spicy
ATHENA: It's just lemon juice?
ARES: oh.
PERSEPHONE: You have two hours for this challenge! On your marks -
HADES: GO! [ PERSEPHONE looks at him like wtf ] I'm impatient, you know this.
Frantic montage of the time passing and various kitchen catastrophes. At 30 minutes to go, the ceiling has a hole in it, the walls are no longer white and are instead a burnt orange and the majority of team 1 are arguing
APHRODITE: [ waving knife in the air ] Zeus, just because Hera didn't chop off your dick, doesn't mean I won't.
ZEUS: Just get her to talk to me, at least.
HERA: [ completely ignores Zeus ] Aphrodite, I have the cream and the herbs for the top of the soup.
APHRODITE: Great! Where's Demeter?
HERA: Harassing Persephone about her relationship with Hades, I think they're trying to get her thrown off the show.
ZEUS: It's not like she's doing anything wrong as such.
HERA: of course you would think that.
ZEUS: Calm down.
EPISODE TWO
Start from the beginning
