OBSIDIAN ISSUE #2 : WOUNDED

THREE

Hindi man lang ako dinala sa ospital. Not that I needed them to bring me but did the thought ever crossed their minds? To have me healed? Si Inay Hirelda pa ang gumamot sa akin at ang anak niya na kumuha ng nursing sa isang community college.

After that incident, emptiness has become my new home. There's a newfound darkness within me where sadness loves to hide and play games with my withering soul. Lahat ng gusto kong gawin ay nalagpasan ko na pero ganoon pa rin. I don't know how to get out of here. Nawalan na ako ng gana sa lahat. Ni hindi ko na maangat ang kamay ko para makapagsulat muli.

Pagod akong bumaba sa sasakyan pagkatapos pagbuksan ng driver. Upon stepping in the aesthetic and minimalistic-styled interior of the clinic, the staffs chorused a good morning to my mother. I saw how she smiled back at them, ganoon din ang mga kawani pero tipid lamang ang aking sinukli.

Since the scars are still fresh, more on creams daw muna ang ipapagamit sa akin sa halip na laser treatment. But knowing Graciella Vidaurri and her antipathy towards my face, she wants to do something more. Kaya habang nakahiga ako roon, tanaw ang ina kong naka-surgical mask, I was listening to her conversation with the assistants about the procedure for my face. Wala na akong pakialam kung anuman ang gusto nilang baguhin. I'm tired of trying to fight against people who wouldn't even consider hearing my pleas. I'm tired of fighting for myself. All of my words and objections fall invalid leading me to think that I've always been doing the wrong things. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. So might as well they decide for me if that's what they think suits best.

Pumikit na lamang ako at natulog.

"Ma'am, gising na po..."

A light shake of my body pulled me to consciousness. Nang dumilat, isang babaeng staff na naka-scrub uniform ang ngumiti sa akin. Slowly, I sat up and climbed down the surgical bed.

"Okay na ba? Tapos na? Sino na kamukha kong artista?" matamlay kong biro.

Marahan itong natawa. "Wala naman pong binago sa 'yo ma'am. Bigla kasing dumating 'yong client ni Dra.Vidaurri, scheduled na po kaya iyon ang inuna. Pero nalagyan na po ng ointment itong scar niyo."

Tumango ako at tahimik na nagpasalamat. Lumabas ako ng silid na dama pa rin ang kirot ng sugat at lamig ng cream sa aking pisngi. I could hear my mother's voice in one of the rooms as I passed by the corridor that leads to the waiting area. Now seeing the pastel couches, I found a vacant space for me to settle. Pero halos matigilan ako nang mahagip ang isang pamilyar na mukha.

Elle Nadeinna, my mother's main client and endorser of her clinic and its products, was scanning through a magazine in a classy way. Isa siya sa may pinakamagandang mukha sa showbiz ngunit madalas nababatikos dahil umano sa maraming napagawa sa kanyang mukha. But regardless, she has one of the kindest hearts I've ever known.

Freezing the memory, inakala ko talaga noon na simpleng batian lamang ang mananaig sa amin. But looking back from it now, meeting her was one of the turning points in my life. What happened to her did quite an impact to me and why I couldn't seem to forget about it was for a reason with a remote hold to her fame.

Umupo ako sa tabi niya. She faintly looked up but had recognized me straight off.

"Hi, Deirdre." Ang mahinhin niyang tinig ay hindi ko makakalimutan.

"Hello..."

"You've grown so much." Her almond eyes made a trip all over me until they narrowed at my cheek with mild accusation and curiosity. Pinigilan ko na ang takas ng tanong niya sa harang ko ng sagot roon.

"Accidental wound," sabay marahang hawak sa pisngi na medyo basa pa dahil sa cream.

"Oh, I thought..." She blinked the assumption away and smiled. "Anyway, kamusta? I remember when I first saw you, eleven years old ka pa yata? Ngayon, dalaga ka na. You've grown beautifully..."