It Will Be Okay (SONADOW)

chapter 4

POV: Sonic
I sat on the edge of my bed and grabbed my sharp knife. I looked at it closely. It was covered in my dried up blood. It looked like a murder weapon covered in its victim's blood. And that victim was me, the killer was me. It's complicated but I understand it. Maybe you don't. It's like you're trapped. You're not just one soul, it's broken and each piece of your soul is another side of you. Two sides, one causing all the trouble and the other will suffer the consequences. But hey, it is how it is. There is nothing me, you or anyone can do. You can't fix a broken soul. Maybe you can fix a broken heart, but mine broke years ago. I shook my head and got out of my trance. I held the knife against my wrist and began slicing through my skin

Slash...

There is one cut. One cut for one sin.

Slash...

One for my mom.

Slash...

One for my sister.

Slash...

One for my brother.

Slash...

One for being a bad hero.

Slash...

One for being a terrible friend.

Slash...

One for not being able to be loved.  I deserve more than that.

Slash... Slash... Slash...

That's more like it.

I held my knife ready for another cut while tears rolled down my muzzle. I saw the time on my watch.

No, I don't have enough time to punish myself... One last cut...

I made a big cut from my upper arm down to my underarm.

That one is for loving Shadow, the one who hates me with all his heart and wants to have me dead.

I put my knife away and stood up. My arms were shaking and blood was dripping from arms like rain. I went to the bathroom and took a hot shower, letting my wounds sting. After I was done showering, I dried myself off with a towel and wrapped bandages around my arms. I looked at myself in the mirror. Horrible as usual. I brushed my hair before leaving the bathroom. I went back to my bedroom and grabbed a pair of clothes. Black pants and a red sweater. I know most males don't wear clothes, but I do, to cover my cuts. I pulled them on and went downstairs. I grabbed an apple and my backpack before I went to school.

———

When I arrived at school, Shadow was standing at the gates. He saw me and smirked.

Well shit, I'm already doomed.

"Hey Faker." Shadow said as he walked up to me.

"H-Hi Shadow." I greeted him. You could hear I was scared and nervous.

"No need to be scared Hedgehog, I'm not going to hurt you." He said.

Could I trust him? Or is it a trap?

"I swear." Shadow said and put his hands up in the air to show me that he wasn't a threat. He then took my hand which made me blush and shocked but also confused.

Why would Shadow hold my hand? It doesn't make sense.

Shadow started walking while dragging me along in a gentle way. I was still confused but smiled lightly. I mean, my crush was holding my hand. Though he bullied me too.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Somewhere. I want to show you something." Shadow answered as he smirked at me, not in the way he normally did but different. I blushed a little and looked away from him. "There is no need to become shy now. It's not like I'm going to kill you." He said. I looked back at him and saw he was smiling but something seemed off. I ignored it since I knew Shadow rarely smiled. He took me to the restroom. He stopped and looked at me as he held both of my hands. I looked into his eyes. Shadow smirked and held my hands tighter. "You guys can come out." he said. Fleetway, Mephiles, and Scourge came out from their hiding places. My eyes widened as I tried to get away. Shadow smirked and pulled me against him while Scourge and Fleetway tied my feet and wrists together and Mephiles tied the cloth around my mouth. Shadow picked me up once they were done and set me on a toilet. Tears were rolling down my muzzle as I looked down while they tied me to the toilet. He laughed at me and so did the other three. After they locked the door, they left.

Why..? Why me..? Why am I still asking this question while I know the answer already..?