Messages » Larry AU

Chapter 12

I sighed as the bell run and slowly stood up, making my way out of the room and towards the History class room. Due to my slow walk I entered just in time as Mrs. Young was about to start. I sat down, my face hid behind my fringe, preventing others from seeing me and myself from glancing at Harry.

It was only 50 minutes. I had to stay strong for 50 minutes, not longer. I could hide myself in one of the  restrooms during lunch if I needed to. I only needed to hold my tears back for a little less than an hour.

“Harold, if you can spend my lesson with doodling, I’m sure you know when the first World War started?” Mrs. Young’s voice suddenly sounded, making me freeze at the use of Harry’s name. “Uhm, I think in 1914, Miss.” Harry replied sounding as if he was on the edge of tears. I looked up in surprise, when suddenly he turned is head to the left and I was met with his eyes. A look of pure, utter sadness in his green-coloured orbs. And as much as I wished to hate him, to forget about him, to not care for him, my eyes filled with tears anyway, slowly dripping down onto the table before me

Hearing his beautiful, smooth voice after so many days and weeks was too much for me. A rather loud-ish sob escaped my lips, and before I could think about my actions, I had already jumped up, grabbed my bag and was rushing through the door, trying to get away as fast as possible.

I was so ashamed of myself. It wasn’t only that I had started crying in my History class, no. I had also started crying in the presence of Harry. The person I wanted to show the most that I could live without him, that I had gotten over him.

My view blurred by tears, I ran down the empty hallways, stopping only then when I had reached the door to the boy’s bathroom. I stumbled into the first cubicle and swiftly closed the door behind me, leaning to the wall next to it and sliding down to the dirty floor. Burying my head into my hands, I gave up and let all the tears, that had built up throughout the whole day, fall down from my eyes, followed by soft sniffles escaping my mouth.

Suddenly I could hear the door to the bathroom open, making me panic slightly. It couldn’t be a student, as everyone had still lesson, so it had to be a teacher. And that meant I was honestly fucked. I tried hard to stifle my sobs, even though I was pretty sure I had already been heard. The person stopped in front of the door to my cubicle, seemingly to contemplate whether to come in or not. This made my conjecture of it being a teacher rather unlikely. Why would they be unsure of coming in or not?

So it had to be a student, which meant I’d either get beaten up or laughed at. And I didn’t want any of that, so I tried to keep quiet, though my cheeks were still getting drenched by my tears. Maybe they would go away if they didn’t hear me anymore. What a foolish thought.

Moments later the door opened and someone stepped in. I didn’t look up though, I had my arms slung around my legs and my head buried into my knees. The person sighed softly and then sat down next to me, which confused me even more.

But then it hit me. The scent. Vanilla mixed with cinnamon, creating the most delicious smell I had ever inhaled. Harry’s scent. But it couldn’t be. Why would he, of all people, run after me? He didn’t care about me. He had made that very clear. However, he still was here now. And though I hadn’t looked up yet, I still was pretty sure it was him.

No one I had ever met, had smelled as incomparable as him. “I know, I’m probably the last person you’d want to see right now…” his voice was quiet, filled with so much sadness and hatred for himself, it made my heart ache in a way so painfully, I was surprised it didn’t stop beating. “But… I’m sorry.”

And when those two little words had left his mouth, nothing but anger and rage filled my body. He had broken my heart, he had made me cry, he had made me feel worthless. Did he really think ‘I’m sorry’ would make everything better and I’d be my same old happy self again? “No, Harry. Sorry isn’t always enough.” I spat, my lips trembling as another sob tried to get through them, but I suppressed it. Harry didn’t need to see how much he really affected me.