Emotionless (Spock Love Story) -COMPLETE

Dance

I dressed in a gorgeous ivory gown, perfectly flowing and elegant. It was a gown my father got me a few years ago, for my summer performance of the Viennese waltz - my most favorite dance of all. I had originally worn elegant gloves, as to make sure my sensitive hands would not end up in an accidental Vulcan kiss, however tonight, I doubted I'd dance much, if at all. I wasn't sure I was up for it, given my mood. So they were placed within my small lace handbag, only to be taken out if necessary.

The dress was sleeveless and had an elegant neckline. The bodice was made of lace that went all the way down until it hit the bow. The back was open, exposing the skin from the nape of my neck to my waist, where a semi-light champagne satin ribbon tied into a bow. The lace ended under the ribbon, and from there the slightly-puffy chiffon skirt flowed with every movement I made all the way down to my ankles. It was the perfect fullness, and it spun out with perfect elegance. It had shocked me that my father had such wonderful taste.

I had tied my waist-length hair into an elegant, almost bridal, half-up hairstyle, showcasing my natural curls, and placing small crystal hair pieces into it. My makeup was minimal. Very simple. I used tans and light browns on my lids and a simple tinted lip balm. I had minimal blusher and contouring, but enough to give me some color. The most decorative and intricate thing that I had on was some of Nina's henna. Her favorite elegant, thin, lace-like design was now stained dark onto my pale skin, winding up each of my hands, up past my forearms and to my elbows.

I sighed, looking in the mirror once more.

"I hope you have fun tonight, Amanda," I whispered. "Maybe you can stay with Sarek. Watch all the dancing. Just... have fun and know that we love you. And we miss you... And mama... I remember how much you loved my dancing. I always felt it in your heart... It made me so happy, it made me feel whole. Like I knew you cared and you loved seeing me so happy... even when you called it illogical..." that made me smile a bit before I sobered, trying not to cry. "I miss you, mama," I whispered.

I took one last deep breath before turning to walk out of the empty room.

The completely empty room.

As Nina too had died on the U.S.S. Farragut.

~:~:~:~:~

I stood at the bar, finally gathering enough courage to try a Pineapple Cooler. A very tropical, very weak alcoholic drink I found I actually liked very much, much to my own chagrin, as I like to avoid alcohol. The Vulcan part of me hated the very idea of alcohol. But I tried to blame my father, as it was him who ordered it for me.

"It's lonely back home," my father admitted in his slight Irish accent. His accent was so much lighter than my own, as he had actually grown up in the United States. "Especially now."

"If you wish, father, I can transfer until-"

"No, no, please," he interrupted, taking a big sip of his own-much stronger-drink. "Not now that I've bought a home here."

"What?" I asked, my heart skipping a beat.

"I could see it in your eyes, Maeve," he admitted. "Whenever you speak of this place. You love it here. You love the people, the work, and you've made friends. For the first time in your life you have real friends. You're happy here, Maeve. And if you're happy here, there's got to be something I'll end up loving as well."

I felt tears prick my eyes and I didn't know what to say.

"Father, I sent out my candidacy as Ambassador to New Vulcan."

"Ambassador?" he asked. "Where did this come from?"

"A recent... turn of events," I said, unsure of what else I should say. I supposed one little white lie wouldn't hurt anything. "I suppose you could say I wish to remain connected to mama."