Judged

gold and garbage

there are days.

when you hate yourself.

you wanna kill yourself

you wanna curse yourself again and again and again.

maybe you'll understand if you remove the yous to Is.

but you know what? it basically happens to you when you're depressed and  when you can't get over something about yourself.

but to me...

it happens when I love god so much...

I wanna go back to him to see him even if my tears turn into blood.

000

"LAYLA WAKE UP!!!" I woke up with someone screaming over my ear I sat up with a tired face and when I looked at mom with half of my eyes opened I laid back in retreat.

"get up your late for school" mum said and I covered my head with a pillow.

"you're lying again to get me up" I murmured.

"Oh, so you didn't want to go to buy your new dog today?"

I sprung out of bed with the realization "oh my god that was today?!" 

I saw mum smiling reluctantly from the corner of my eyes and I rushed to the bathroom and when I was done with breakfast I told mum I'm going to the pet store with my brother.

the meowers open today only and a few more days in the week when I can't really go because I have the longest classes in those days.

so I had scheduled by telling mum to remind me I had to go get a pet, Alan really wanted it.

  "cat or dog?" I asked as I drived to the store with him.

"cat!" 

"okay...what color?" 

"that doesn't have to matter, what matters is how she behaves with me"

"okay, so we're going to have a testing session then?" I smirked

"I guess" he replied, I was shocked how he was actually serious about what he said. and when I thought about it, it did make sense.

even the filthiest of the garbage can be covered with a gold and silver.

what is pleasing to the eye might not be pleasing to the soul for the other
Thus shape yourself oh servant
For there are things you must go through..
I shrugged off myself from my thoughts and realized I could see the meowers getting closer
We stopped I parked the car and went.