Ethereal

Chapter 19

The room wasn't just built into the wall like Noah's was, I was right at the top of the building, mine was the only room on this floor, so I had the whole floor as my room. It was still small, but it meant that I had even more wall space, so the room looked particularly empty. 

"That was... incredible." I told him, a little out of breath. "I never thought that I'd be able to fly." 

He smiled at me warmly, and then turned to look out of the archway, looking a little sad. "I've always taken flight for granted." He told me. "I've always been able to do it, I've never met anyone here that couldn't fly. Hardly anyone walks up here, where they don't have to. We aren't really meant to fly on Earth, you see. Not if it can be avoided. It draws too much attention."

"Do you think..." I frowned, walking over to join Noah. "That I'll ever... be able to fly? On my own?"

Noah didn't speak for a few seconds. "I don't know... I've never seen someone grow wings before. They're just... there. Sure, we can pull them in, but... I constantly have to focus on keeping them in, it's a relief to unfurl them. But you don't have that feeling, do you?" 

I closed my eyes for a moment, feeling for my back. I wanted badly to feel the thing he was describing, the pressure of something waiting to be released. But there was nothing, I was completely relaxed, frowning again, I shook my head. 

He shrugged. "We know so little about you, Emilia." He said quietly. "A month ago you weren't able to stop a van. Now you can. Perhaps with time..." 

Right. But it was unlikely. 

Perhaps seeing the sad expression on my face, he rushed to comfort me. "Wings are overrated anyway. They're terrible on Earth, get in the way of everything." 

"We aren't on Earth." It was pretty pessimistic, but it was true. Without wings I couldn't fit in here. Noah had said himself, hardly anyone walks in Heaven. They don't need to. 

But there wasn't much I could do about it. 

"So, um. How do I go about getting a bed in here?" I asked, trailing my hand across one of the empty shelves. It would be nice to have something in the room. 

I didn't feel tired exactly, but I did feel like I wanted to go to sleep. I needed to absorb the days events, I hadn't slept since before the van incident. 

"I'll fetch one for you." He promised, and went to stand on the edge of the wall, his toes hanging off. I couldn't help the automatic panic that rose in me, even though I knew he would be fine, he could fly. That didn't stop me from worrying. 

"Hey Noah?" I asked, stopping him from leaving. He looked up at me, waiting for me to speak. "What time is it? How soon will it get dark?"

He seemed confused for a moment, before realisation dawned on him. "It doesn't get dark here. There's no sun, like there is on Earth. Time doesn't really have much meaning here... I could tell you the time and date it is on Earth?" 

"Oh... okay, um. The time in Entilin then?" I asked, looked out at the blue sky. The bright sky that was never going to dim, there was no night here. And time barely passes... I had never felt so far from home before. The furthest I'd ever been was France (on a school trip - it had been a gift to our class from one of the school's donor's). 

He was thoughtful for a second. "Fourteen minutes past ten. In the evening." 

Had it really only been a day since I had opened that portal? Noah was right - time really did pass strangely here. 

"How is there light with no sun?" I asked, "Why is there no night here?"

He shrugged. "The light you see is angel light, when we are here, we can show our true forms. A human would turn crazy if they saw it, with the amount up here... they'd die, most likely. Until they've passed on, at least. So, all the light comes from us. Though it's absorbed and reflected by the cloudsoil too, so the light just comes from... everywhere." 

Looking out across the view again, what he said did seem to be true. The light did seem like it was coming from the ground, from the buildings. From far away, the flying angels were simply globs of light.

It was quite beautiful to look at. 

"Right, well. I best go sort your bed then." Noah said, and with a short wave, he leaned forwards so that his weight was on his toes, resulting in him dropping out of the window. 

I rushed forwards as he fell, holding onto the edge of the archway and peering down. 

He fell for a few seconds, and then suddenly his wings expanded outwards, beat once, and he was soaring, flying high, high above me. So high that it hurt to crane my neck up to watch him. And then I could no longer see him, he was just a dot in the distance. 

I stayed watching for a little while, seeing the angels coming and going was sort of mesmerising. I watched two jump out of a window side by side, unfurling their wings in unison. 

All of the angels had wings dripping with silver, it caught the light nicely, making them appear shiny. I couldn't help but reach my hand back to my shoulders, feeling the smooth skin there (had it always been so smooth?) and noticing the distinct absence of wings. 

I kept watching until I couldn't stand it any longer. Jealousy wasn't going to help me. I stepped back into the room, heading for the centre where there was a trapdoor. Underneath, was the long staircase that led to the ground. 

I dropped down out of the trapdoor, similar to how Noah had dropped out of the archway (though his feat was far more beautiful than mine), and began the endless descent. 

Only 400 floors to go. I sighed, how easy it would be to have wings, to be able to fall out the window and let gravity pull you down, to be able to catch yourself at the end like a bird. 

Still, it could have been worse. I didn't tire out as easy as I used to, so though the many steps were quite tedious, I still had plenty of energy.

Which was weird, because normally when I wasn't around angels, I felt pretty tired. I hadn't felt tired on my own when I went to the portal, but I had put it down to my adrenaline. 

I wasn't feeling any adrenaline now, was it this place, feeding me energy? Or perhaps I had simply reached the stage where I didn't need as much energy, because I had already changed enough.

Was this the limit of my powers? Would I ever be able to fly, if that were the case?

I hoped not, so I liked to think that Heaven itself was supplying me the energy. Like I was absorbing the angels light like the cloudsoil did. 

That would be kinda neat. Though I did feel sort of bad, like I was just using this place for my own gain. I wondered if I'd be able to give back to the angels, to Heaven.

Did I have a use here? Could I be helpful?

I hoped that the answer was yes. That somehow they would need me, and accept me because of that. 

It turned out that I was right - they would need me. Just not quite yet.

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