freshman | h.s

019

"are you thirsty? i'm going to the kitchen i can get you something" i ask harry as he sits on the couch watching cartoons

"waters fine" he answers me still not looking away from the television "thank you"

i drink myself a large glass of water before refilling the same glass and bringing it to him. it's the weekend now. after dropping andrew off i came straight to harry's house, it's not like my mom will notice she's probably out somewhere too.

harry's large hands take the glass of water from me and gulped it down quickly. suddenly he just stares at me making me think i might have something on my face which made turn away

"what?" i giggle, shy from his intense stare

"your hair looks different" he tilted his head, reaching his hands out to me

i took them, falling onto his lap, "  i used this purple shampoo and it made it more grey. i'm surprised you even noticed. does it look good?" i asked

i was shocked that he noticed because i could've sworn that it didn't look any different but i guess not

"yes" harry smiled, pecking my lips

suddenly he had us flipped, my back was flat against the couch as my legs were wrapped around him. his face found its way in between the curve of my neck and shoulder as he just laid there. something ive noticed that he loves to do

"have you talked to grace?" he asked, his voice mumbled against my shoulder

"no, have you?" i messaged the back of his head

suddenly he sits up to look at me "hell no her and i have nothing to talk about"

i wasn't going to talk about it anymore then i already have but we all had something to talk about. she took dick from my boyfriend why isn't that something to talk about? i giggle at the thought but this is serious. we all need to discuss where we stand with each other

"i don't want to talk about it" i huff

thinking about it stresses me out. i love grace. she's my best friend and i don't want something that was so in the moment to ruin our friendship or make harry not like her. i know that he'll never talk to her again though and i'm sure it's only because he doesn't want me to think   he'll leave me for her or sneak around with her now. just the thought of all of this exhaust me

"are you embarrassed by it?" he asks me in a whisper, still not lifting his head to look at me

was i embarrassed by it? i guess in a sense i was. i wish it never happened  cause then maybe now i wouldn't feel so eager to ignore my best friend, maybe things wouldn't be so complicated as they are now in this very moment. i want us to still be friends but when feelings are involved things become more complicated and the last thing i want to do is hurt grace or harry

"i just want it to go away. nobody did anything wrong we were just drunk and stupid and because of it were all going to have to struggle with this awkwardness" i sign

after everything with andrew and grace i'm sure of what i want now. i'm a needy girl and i'll do anything for attention which is why i consisted on playing with the emotions of the both of them. i didn't necessarily want either one of them but instead just there company. i never thought that in that process i would hurt harry. all of these unknown things going on behind his back... it's wrong. i played with graces emotions and i had moments with andrew. i wish i would tell harry but that'd only make things worse. the last thing harry deserved was that, being led on by me but i'm sure now. harry's the only one that i want and i'll do anything to keep him

"we can just act like it never happened. i don't know what came over me i just... i don't know but i'm sorry for pressuring you baby. i know you weren't sure and we pushed ourselves on you"

honestly i wish we didn't have to talk about it.

"we can't just act like it never happened when grace is attached to me and she's my best friend " i push him up "i'm gonna call her" i begin to sit up

"baby please don't" he begged pushing my body back down

" i have to harry. i need to just clear the air. i'll explain everything" i quickly push him off and pull myself to my feet

it'll be quick and easy as long as i'm honest and tell how i really feel and allow her to do the same. i know i shouldn't be doing this over the phone but i can't even imagine watching her face as i explained to her that her and i will only ever be friends

"what is there to explain?" harry rose his voice slightly

"that i only want you!" i yelled back

his emerald eyes became still after that and he relaxed in his seat. without another word being said harry watched as i grabbed my phone to dial her number

"olivia!" she answered, sounding a bit relieved at the sound of my voice

"grace.. hey" i sigh, "we need to talk"

okay sooo it's been like five million years since i updated and i know i'm a horrible person for keeping y'all waiting this long for a chapter that's trash anyways  but i just needed to update... much love.

forgive me :(