~αquαríuѕ~

~prologue

What can I say?
I was born on January 23rd.
My mom was only 15 when I was born.
My abuela was very religious and was convinced that my birth was due to "the second coming" and "immaculate conception".
She also depended very much on astrology and horoscopes.
Deep inside she knew that her daughter was a whore.
Aquarius was only supposed to be my name until they found adoptive parents.
According to my abuela "We fell in love with you and just knew we couldn't give you up"
I don't think that's the case.
I think that my abuela punished my mom for whoring it up and not caring about me.
Or that they just gave up looking.
My abuela made my mom take full responsibility of being a mother.
She was not a fan.
When she was 18 she gave up again.
We never saw her again.
When I was little I'd draw pictures of what she might've looked like.
I'd imagine coming and meeting her.
Sometimes she'd tell me about all the adventures she'd been on, how she was kidnapped and couldn't take care of me and then thought I hated her so she thought I was better off.
Sometimes she'd beg for forgiveness and ask me to come live with her.
But she always, always was married with two children, a brother and sister.
Part of me knew that was a lie.
If it was true, why would abuela burn all the pictures of her own daughter.
If it was true why would abuela only refer to her as "the slut"
Something wasn't fitting together.