Under the sea | phan

Chapter 1

Dan woke up drenched in sweat for the 5th time this week, his body aching from the lack of rest and food that hadn't refuelled his system over the past few days. bones jutted out from his shirtless torso showing the imperfect ridges of his ribcage that shuddered at every forced breath that passed though his dry lips and swirled in his lungs.

He withered around in his damp sheets, trying to get comfortable and maybe sleep until school but gave up, even if he did get back to sleep it would mean more nightmares and tears that he couldn't give.

Groping the sheets with his hands he searched for his phone, in the pitch black of his room he couldn't see so he relied on the feeling of cold glass that brushed over his fingertips and grabbed the phone from the tangle of sheets. It was a gift from the home for being a 'good boy' for a year. More likely that they pitted him, he thought bitterly and bit his lip, turning on his phone and scrolling through the social media sites that controlled most of his school and housed the sluts and jockeys of his year group.

Looking through these sites just made his faith in humanity decrease at every second with the 'duck' faced girls with too much foundation and dudes bragging to other dudes about how many 'chicks' they had slept with this week, the number that was guaranteed to be into double digits by the end of a Sunday night. Dan was different. Dan didn't judge people by how many people they slept with. Let alone who they slept with, unlike the other pupils at his school. The word faggot was one of the most frequent ones, probably used more than 'and' and 'i' in his school. The teachers usually agreed, homophobic people were the top of the food chain in the unfair habitat of his school, their prey the 'faggots' that were no different from themselves except from the fact that they yearned for a love that was not 100% accepted by society.

Sighing and checking the time he realized he has 4 hours to kill before he had to start getting ready for school at 6:30and exited the social media site after realizing that he had no notifications and probably never will, no matter how many times he refreshed the page and posted pictures or statuses, would appear on his screen. 'Friends' and 'followers' were for popular people. And popular Dan was not.

He reached for his earphones and plugged them into his iPod, swapping them with his headphones which he found uncomfortable to sleep in, and placed the buds in his ears, turning the volume up all the way. He did that when he didn't want to think and tonight was one if them nights. He chose 'shuffle' on all songs and smiled contently when My Chemical Romance-Mama started to play and snuggled into his covers.

The sound of an alarm rudely awoke the brunette and made him groan in annoyance. pausing the current song that was playing, The killers - Mr bright side, Dan swung his legs over the side of his mattress and stood unsteadily on his still sleepy feet, swaying whilst hobbling to the shared shower that the home used. Unlocking his door Dan checked to see if any other children were in the bathroom, not wanting the awkward convocation that would occur if he had to ask someone, politely, to leave muttering apologies as they would grumpily stomp back to there small, shared room. Dan was lucky, because he was one of the eldest -16- he was allowed the privacy of his own room. small, and cramped, but it was his own space nevertheless and he cherished it, pasting the peeling, dirty walls with posters of the people that meant the world to him, but in return they didn't even know his name he was just 'another fan' to them and would never be anything more.

Before he thought too much into the topic of how the people on his walls would never know him, likely leading him to another infamous existential crisis, Dan, knowing that the coast was clear, slid out of the crack between the door and the wall and skilfully dodged the creaking floor boards that would most likely wake up half of the home with the annoying squeaks that Dan was sure that the carers made sure were there so that none of the popular kids could sneak out when everyone was sleeping to go to some illegal rave and get high. Finally he made it to the bathroom door and hesitantly pulled it open, still not knowing for sure if someone had just forgotten to lock the door, but to his excitement it was empty. Being the first one in the bathroom was probably one the best things that could happen in Dan's life at the moment. Being able to know that you won't be hit by unpleasantly cold water unexpectedly because someone before you used up all the hot water. Turning the tap on to allow the water to warm up Dan pulled off his boxers, the only thing he slept in, and submerged himself in the hot water, forgetting about all his troubles for a moment before he realized the others would be up soon so he should probably hurry up if he didn't want them banging on the door about their 'hair' and 'makeup'

Quickly shampooing and rinsing his now curly hair the teenager stepped out from the steamy shower and brushed his teeth before running back to his room, that was at the end of the corridor, scared that he would accidentally flash someone wearing only his boxers. And nobody wanted to see that.

Running a towelling through his knotty hair Dan dried the rest of his body and pulled on his shitty school uniform, a white blouse with a red tie that was now a rusty colour due to the fact that he hadn't had a new one since year 8, and he only got a new one then because the bully's of his year had ripped up his first one, knowing that because he 'wasn't wanted by his parents' (their words not his) and that he was in the care home he wouldn't be able to get a new one. the money that the home had just didn't stretch to buying a new tie every time some dickhead ripped his tie up for sitting in 'his' seat. so Dan had to get a tie from the school lost property. so actually he hadn't had a new tie since year 7. great.

Shoving his muscle less as through the black blazer that had overly exaggerated shoulder pads, making him look more 'manly' and 'tough' Dan thought it just made him look stupid as the rest of him was literally the body of an 8 year old girl.

Sighing he sat down in the chair facing his small and cracked mirror, getting out his one pound GGHS and plugging them in. Groaning Dan tried desperately to pull a brush through his now dry and curly hair, almost breaking the brush in the progress and ending up with a frizzy mop. Tugging the straighteners through his brunette hair Dan mutter to himself about how he was going to get some straighteners that actually worked and didn't singe his already damaged hair. People kept telling him that 'straightening his hair every day would be damaging' but he decided that he would rather die than go to school with his 'hobbit hair' as the staff fondly called it. So dying it is.

Slinging his packed bag over his shoulder, after switching off his straighteners and brushing through his hair, Dan opened his door and slowly walked to the stairs, not bothering to watch for the creaky floor boards now as the hole house was awake and getting ready, and once at the bottom of the steep and unstable staircase he walked into the kitchen and grabbed a slice of slightly burnt toast that was already buttered with honey spread on it and walked the front door, Yelling a quick goodbye before plugging in his headphones and drowning out the world until he got to hell.

*school

My bad.

~~~~~~~~~

I HOPE YOU  ENJOYED *THROWS COOKIES AT YOU* PEACE 

edit :

this is a really embarrassing A/N that i left a year ago that i have decided to leave on here as a reminder of my rAnDoM !1! thirteen year old self.