My Oppa, Kim Jongin

Chapter 32 - I Wanna Start A Fight!

Kai’s P.O.V:

“What do you mean?” I asked him.

Is Oh Sehun trying to be deep? To be honest, I don’t really know what being “deep” means. What’s the point in sharing your emotions and feelings with others when you know they’ll turn on you one day? Unfortunately, you cannot fully trust anyone, not even if they are really close to you. At the end of the day, we all live for ourselves….not for anybody else. We were trained when we were mere humans to fend for ourselves, simply because –I guess- one day we must let go, even if we are reluctant to do so.

“I’m too hungry to explain, hyung.”

“Typical” I scoffed, speeding up to walk ahead of him. We had reached the town centre and we were almost at the takeaway. I made sure my hood was up and I was about to glance back at the maknae to make sure his was up too, until I realised that he had caught up with me.

“Hyung! I didn’t mean it like that. I just – oh, I don’t know. I guess what I’m trying to say is that….without each other, we are useless.”

“Excuse me?”

“We are one, right? We’ll always be there for one another-“

“That’s not veracious, Sehun-ah. It isn’t true! Did you or did you not see ALL of our hyungs walk away from me? You were the only one who cared!”

“Then we are the real wolves. They are coward puppies.” He replied casually as he opened the door to the takeaway shop.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to understand you, Oh Sehun” I muttered quietly, shaking my head at him.

“There we go! You don’t understand me, and apparently I won’t understand you. We can be misunderstood together, hyung.”

“Sehun-ah, when did you become so………”

“Understanding? Caring? Wise? You know hyung, wolves are often misunderstood. We grow up hearing all these stories about ‘the Big Bad Wolf’ and the old tale ‘The Boy Who Cried Wolf’, but is that really what a wolf is like? Sure, wolves may be intimidating and they may like to rip their prey to shreds, but guess what? I like to eat meat too! Really, they are vulnerable just like us. They are only like this because they need to protect themselves; they do this to stay alive. A wolf may look tough on the outside, but that is only an excuse to hide the truth. People who act like they are always strong only do this to break through the hard barriers in life, am I right, hyung?”

By now, all fifteen people in the shop had turned to stare at Sehun…..including me.

“Sehun-ah……………………………I’d never thought I’d hear such a thing come out of your mouth.” I must admit, I was dumbstruck.

“Please answer me, hyung. I’m right, aren’t I?”

I dropped my head down to look at the floor. I never thought anybody would be able to know how I felt, especially not the maknae.