Leaving the Horse

Chapter 11

Thunder glanced at me from the corner of his eye, flooding with concern. "What's been happening? You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said quickly, "but it is a long story."

Thunder shrugged, "Alright."

We went into the woods onto a trail leading to a small clear lake. A tree hovered over it on one side, providing shade and branches to swing off of. Josh and Sam used to always take Thunder and me here, which was how Thunder began to fancy me.

Tying us to the usual tree near the lake so we could drink, Josh and Sam stripped to their underwear and dipped into the water. I pawed at the ground in protest. It had seemed like forever since we came here. The least he could do was ride me into the lake!

I was at first nervous of carrying someone in water, with the fear to drown, but I learned quickly that I was still as strong in the water as I was out and from there on, I enjoyed it almost as I did as a human kid playing in water. Josh glanced back at me before looking at Sam. "Why not? She has missed it as much as me."

Sam smiled, "I'll get Thunder."

After removing all out tack but bridles and lead ropes that were always kept in our saddle bag, Josh and Sam mounted onto us and used their lead ropes to steer us in. I ignored Josh's slow commands and instead waded quickly into the water, raising my hooves extra high to splash as I did so. Sam kicked Thunder forward who happily followed suit. Josh laughed as he grasped mane to steady himself.

I twisted my neck back and called back to Thunder, "you a chicken now? Come on!"

I turned and swam to the middle of the lake, turning around on churning hooves to watch Thunder catch up. Like me, he held his head high above to water, nose flaring as he breathed loudly from the labor. Once he caught up, before I could back away he nuzzled my cheek affectionately.

I drew away. "Thunder, you know I-"

"-I know," he interrupted quickly, "I just wanted you to remember."

I smiled slyly, "you won't let me forget, I'm sure."

He started to groom my shoulder with his teeth. "You are just beautiful, Jay."

As he said this, Josh and Sam seemed to agree to both jump, because they landed in the water beside us in unison before paddling to stay afloat themselves, splashing and wrestling each other mercilessly.

I glanced back at Thunder. "I need you to stop, Thunder," I began, regretfully knowing that what I was about to say would hurt him, "I know you like me-"

"-Love," Thunder corrected.

I sighed, "Love, but I will never feel the same for you. I haven’t now which means I never will." The hurt on Thunder's face hurt me more then I thought it would, but I continued, trying to cheer him up a little, "and you don't even love me Thunder. You say you do, and maybe you even think you do, but you haven’t experienced love. You guys have to mate with whoever the owner chooses; it's never your choice. You will never be able to have me even if I had wanted that. I don't want it," I made sure he knew I didn't, 'and I know it'll never happen. You will never feel love because you’re a horse. You have no say in your life."

"Your a horse too, aren't you Jay? You won't know love either then," Thunder pointed out. "What if you do have to mate with me one day? Because the humans want it. Would you love me then?"

I looked down. I realized I knew enough about a life as a human. Enough to wish it more then being a horse. But I knew it couldn't happen. For my sake, a horse's life was better then a person's. Surely Grace and Jonah would never let it happen?