What happened?

Chapter 1~ Sometimes

Sometimes I looked around, the only thing I see is black and white, void of colours. People define themselves by giving them labels or names to go by. They live their lives carelessly and recklessly by partying their life away without ever finding their purpose.

Sometimes they talked to me and helped me through the hard time if they wanted to but it only makes me disgusted. They gave me smiles but it did not reach to their eyes yet I sense some sort of ill-emotions from them. They who said " I'll always be there for you", it's fake. It's fake. Where were they when I needed them? Where is the help? Why do they said words they don't mean? Why is the world so cold?

Sometimes I wonder around the dull, empty hall way in school waiting for the bell to ring. Until a teacher told me to go to class which I did because I don't like conflict. I hated not being able to speak out loud. 'Friends' always talked over me which the day ended without me not being able to say anything. They went off without waiting for me when they always did so. So what happened? Is it because of what happened? Why are they ignoring me? "Wait!" I screamed but it only fell out like a whisper. As they chatted among themselves about the new gossip that seem to excite everyone. A transfer student. Everyone said the transfer student is the prime minister's second eldest son, Luka Anderson, a.k.a 'the Crown Prince' as everyone called him but I don't get why they liked him because I've seen him. The real him without any mask on. The 'fake' persona he always puts on. Okay where was I? Oh yeah...

Sometimes the friends I used to talked to walked past me as if talking to me would contaminate their being. They said being nice to me was the best I could get. No one asked how I was. No one asked what happened but make their own version of my side of the story. Everyone believed that it's my fault. No one believed me. No one. I walked home that is located on top of the hill where everyone thinks I'm a princess who lives in a palace. When in reality I'm not but just a poor student who live there as a freeloader. No one in the house talked to me though except the gardener who always trim the roses everyday and watered the plants as if doing it would gave him the eternal bless. I hated dogs. There are dogs in the house who always barks at me whenever they see me as if I'm not welcomed here. Then my grandfather who always busy with his company work and can't seem to find the time to relax.

Sometimes my parents are always away on business trips, always leaving me with no one to have dinner with. Grandfather is always in his study room with new secretary everyday coming in for an interview which leave them with smeared make-up all over their face and their blouses are wrinkled. Different from the first moment they came here verses now. From what I can remember, I'm always alone. No one willing to take their time off to get to know the people they surrounded themselves with. I know because I've seen it all; the masks. The masks where everyone seems to love them so much that they wear them everyday. Even around their close friends and families. I was disgusted by it because I am too who wear a mask everyday till everyone believed that everything was okay.

Sometimes I put my own happiness beneath others as their happiness is my happiness, that's how I am. I hated to see them sad or unhappy. The only thing I can do is to be someone that I'm not; to be not hated or laughed at. I'm always the quiet girl that everyone asked for my name because they're not bothered to learn my name. I'm always the girl who sit out in P.E. classes because of the group work that no one seem to noticed that I was on their team. Yeah, I'm always the last one to be picked on the team. But what can I do? I'm not good at sport nor teamwork.

Sometimes I wondered why I existed in this cold and lonely world. Everyone said "be independent, I'm not always there to baby you", but all I want is someone to be by my side and support me. I don't need you to help me with everything just stay by my side and I'll do the rest. Why can't they do that? It's that simple. Why? Because everyone is a narcissist that only cared for themselves.

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