I GUESS I DO

Chapter 14

The wedding was… well, it was a wedding. There were tears (not on Beca's part obviously) there was laughter (though again, Beca remained excluded from the inside jokes) and of course, there was a whole lot of love in the air (every second of which was captured on camera by a pompous photographer that was probably charging ten times too much).

Beca had to admit though, in spite of all that was said about Rachel (or Raquel, depending on who she was talking to), the girl looked good, although her dress was too fluffy, and her tan a little too dark for Beca's liking.

It wasn't the bride that caught her eye though, which was quite something seeing as it was obvious Rachel/Raquel had done everything in her power to ensure her bridesmaids didn't outshine her (Like brown dresses… really?!). She'd failed though. She'd failed miserably.

At least in Beca's opinion she had anyway.

Chloe looked like… perfection. Yea, that's the word Beca thought fit her best. Perfection. It wasn't the dress (for sure) and it wasn't that her hair or makeup was done exceptionally either (her hair was just curled and gripped to the side for all those with an interest in fashion and the likes).

Perhaps it was merely the fact that in the entire time Beca had known Chloe this was the first time she'd had an opportunity to stare for so long without being caught. It was the first time she'd had a chance to soak it all in.

How long her eyelashes were and just how mesmerizingly blue her eyes were beneath them. The way her hair bounced when she walked down the aisle and the façade of angelic innocence that a smile lent her. When the congregation laughed politely at a bad joke it was Chloe's tolerate giggle that floated into Beca's ear, and when a genuine burst of laughter erupted through the pews it was again Chloe's broader, stifled chuckle that caught her attention.

She was just without a notable flaw, and by the time the happy couple danced out of the chapel doors to a thunder of applause Beca was surer than ever that the red head was exactly what she wanted.

(It was just saying it that'd be the problem).

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It's easy to be happy at a wedding. The joy's kind of just absorbed by each pore of your body. Even on the worst day, it was pretty damn difficult to feel mad, or sad, or any negative emotion for that matter.

That's why for the hour and a half they spent in the chapel (because yea, it was one of those super long traditional weddings) Chloe didn't think twice about her problems (except maybe the fact that oh sweet divine she was wearing a brown dress in public). She just let herself be happy, because to hell with it. Unfortunately she knew only too well how long it'd last.

She was wrong.

It actually lasted fifteen seconds longer than she though it would (score!). It wasn't until she was trailing after Rachel out the doors of the chapel that the little switch inside her head was flicked back on again.

All it took was a glance. Just one quick glance into Beca's steely blue eyes and a casual return of the smile Beca gave her and that was Chloe right back to square one again with her emotions. It was like an Olympic gymnast had begun practice in the pit of her stomach all over again.

(Fuck it.)

She knew something had to be done. She knew she couldn't go on like this. The urge to pin Beca to a wall and kiss her until they both went brain dead became more and more overpowering by the second, and in her heart of hearts Chloe knew it wasn't healthy. She knew she couldn't let herself fall any deeper for someone that wasn't willing to catch her.

She needed to end it (whatever "it" was) and the more she thought about it, the more she realized she needed to do it sooner rather than later.

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