9. This Is Bullshit

4.6K 204 15
                                    

Darien Grace

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Darien Grace

"What do you mean you're not coming home with us?" Caleb groaned, staring at me as if I'd grown two heads. He had been arguing with the hospital's staff for just over a week now to try and get my official discharge worked out. They were being almost as stubborn as me. They still believed me to be a danger to myself and they didn't trust Caleb and Jas to look after me. They claimed that if I'd managed to keep something like this from them twice before, that they weren't qualified to spot the signs of my "precarious mental and physical condition". You would have thought that by now, they would have been overjoyed to be rid of me, but no. They were insisting upon either holding me captive or assigning me a live-in—the fuckers. I didn't need a goddamn live-in nurse. It was such a fucking joke.

"Exactly what is sounds like. There's no way in hell that I'm going back there." Caleb rolled his eyes at my tone, looking to Jas for assistance. Wisely, she chose to ignore him, scrolling through her phone. I ducked my head to hide my grin and resumed sorting through the various clothing options she'd brought for me. After sifting through all of our combined bags and reclaiming my wardrobe from her kleptomaniac tendencies, I'd found the best possible option. The majority of my clothes still didn't fit me, despite the fact that Caleb and Jas had been overloading my body with calorie packed lattes and pastries. Most of my pants were still falling off my hips and really none of my bras fit.

"You have to, Dari; that's our home." Even though his back was to me, I knew the expression that he wore. He was exasperated with my behavior. I knew that he felt responsible for his classes along with my wellbeing, but returning to that city wasn't an option.

"Nope," I huffed out, stepping into a pair of distressed boyfriend jeans and securing them around my waist with a worn brown leather belt. I wasn't ready to go back and face the music of a life I wanted nothing more than to move on from.

"John is there alone without the peace of mind that Jasmine and I have of seeing you alive and well."

"So tell him to get his ass on a plane. Jas, throw me that." I pointed to the scrap of sheer black lace that claimed to function as a bralette on the table beside her. When Jas and Caleb had first found me, I hadn't even had the time to properly process the fact that John hadn't been with them. I couldn't deny the whole his absence still left in my life. I missed him so fucking much. Our little family was missing a crucial member, but I understood why he'd had to stay behind. We'd been doing our best to Skype him in every night, but the time difference and the classes John had taken over made it difficult and it wasn't anywhere near the same as having him physically here with us. As much as I hated to admit it, our lives were still undeniably tied to New York. I knew that we'd have to go back eventually, but I also knew that eventually definitely didn't have to mean now.

"Dari—"

"I know, I know. Okay? I can't go back though. I can't—I can't go back to that life. Not now. Not yet." I could feel the panic attack rising rapidly. I couldn't control it, though. I felt so guilty for taking Caleb from the job he loved and Jas from school, but I couldn't go back yet and I couldn't let them go. I just wanted to put the world on pause, but I knew that I couldn't. I couldn't expect everything to just stop because I was having issues coping with reality.

Concerto - A Sonata Sequel (Harry Styles FanFiction)Where stories live. Discover now