do you often feel like your mentally present but your heart is off in another universe? like you hear all the voices and what they're saying but you cant comprehend? I feel like this on a daily. I go off to another dimension and zone off. its like my head leaves my body and I cant feel anything. which isn't bad, not feeling, no pain, no depression, no agony and guilt. but it isn't all bad. not all of it, I've had a good few memories and times. remember back in grade school where you had to make words out of your name? I used to think of the most silliest and funniest names I could think of. smiling and being happy, now all I feel is agony and depression. But with him, it's all different. there's no pain, no flashbacks of shit that happened. He makes me feel like I'm normal.
The night went by too quick. I woke up with a smile. which is rare for me. But it all ended when I heard dad yell for me. I have to go cook breakfast, shocking. I get up and look at my phone... he texted me.
Diego 3:57am:
Hey, you're probably asleep, I had fun last night maybe we can chill again?
Diego 4:04 am
hmu when your lazy ass decides to wake up lol
Diego 5:10 am
sweet dreams lil ma.
I smile like an idiot. I can't fall for this boy. I just can't, it's not gonna work. not after he finds out my secret. he'll leave me in a heartbeat. Should I text back? no, yes, no, fuck it....
Mariah 10:30 am
wow... 3 texts in a row, I got someone sprung huh? lmao
Diego 10:32 am
Just making sure you got home safe, gotta have a clear conscience ya know?
Mariah 10:36 am
and a quick reply back? damn I got yuh whipped!! real gentlemanyly of you to worry about me.
Diego 10:42 am
haha whatever babygirl, I'll call you later aight? I have an interview with some wack ass radio station.
Mariah 10:43 am
okay just call me whenever:)
Diego 10:46am
damn... quick reply and a smiley face.. whos sprung on who now?
Mariah 10:53 am
fuck you...lol bye
***AUTHOR'S NOTE***
SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATES GUYS, JUST TRYING TO GET MY HEAD TOGOTHER YOU KNOW? IM WORKING ON SOME NEW CHAPTERS, JUST GIVE ME SOME TIME AND YOUR PATIENCE. MUCH LOVE! ALSO IM WORKING ON A NEW BOOK GO CHECK IT OUT!
YOU ARE READING
Give Me Shelter ( LIL XAN fan-fiction)
Fanfiction19 year old Mariah has been suffering mental and physical abuse all her life. She finds peace in music and art. Diego is a big time rapper who has money, fame and girls. He's living the life of a king but he's missing something and he doesn't realiz...