13. Romance or Reluctance?

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Varsha's POV.

I felt paralyzed as I saw his eyes scanning my reflection in the mirror and then it met mine and I stared back into his eyes. Does he approve of my look? Does he think I am looking beautiful as everyone said or does he think I am over made? My legs stood up on their own accord and  as I turned to face him my hands went to the veil to cover my head on their own accord. But I couldn't manage to bore into his eyes more, so I rather stared at the floor. I heard his footsteps nearing and I could see his shoes approaching me. His shoes were grand. I didn't know why, but I automatically bent down to touch his shoe clad feet, maybe because that was itched in my brain as a child. I stood up, still staring at his beautiful pair of shoes that looked like it had the works of many intricate golden threads.

I could feel his hand lift my chin up and that's when I realized that he was a lot more taller than me than I thought. I didn't meet his eyes, I was staring at his chest which was wrapped in a little lighter shade than eggplant coloured shawl which looked Royal and also rich jewellery. I could feel a further push upwards of his in my chin and my eyes met his again. I quickly averted my gaze and turned towards the mirror again. I want him to place 'Choodamani' in my head. Should I ask him? I felt something, and I looked up at the mirror only to find him already staring at me. He hugged me... No.. He wasn't hugging me but he placed a beautiful box infront of  me. I looked into the mirror for a moment and went with my instinct as I opened it.

Tears made their way out of my eyes and I wiped them away. Sindhur. The box contains the holy Sindhur, the symbol of a married woman. I wasn't wanting to, but my eyes failed me time and again as they kept on going to stare at Swami's eyes back in the mirror and every time I saw him staring back at me. 'You know, when a child cries, mother knows why, but the wonder of the relation of a husband and wife is that, there is no need for words to be exchanged, not even the expressions, they can just speak through their eyes.' The words of my mother exchanged with my aunt that I overheard as a child, felt true today.

He pinched some Sindhur between his right hand between index and thumb finger and leaned forward to
place the box in the jewellery box, his left hand gripped my shoulder and I closed eyes as he placed it on my forehead. A tear escaped my right eye and I couldn't stop it. I was feeling overwhelmed and just when I felt that life couldn't be more nice to me, I felt him tug at the Choodamani in my hand, my eyes immediately opened and I could see him slightly tugging at it as my grip was really strong, I looked up to again meet his eyes's reflection in the mirror and this time it was accompanied by a smile, more tears escaped my eyes as he took the beautiful piece of jewel and placed it in my head removing the veil and letting it fall in my shoulder.

I just turned and hugged him, I cried a little but mostly tried to control my tears so as to not destroy the beautiful piece of clothing he was adorning. I could feel a gush of air in my ear and pulled away to see him smiling. I smiled and looked down, that was a childish thing to do. But his words next proved that he was not even a little near as innocent as kids are, "A few more moments, in here and we won't be able to start any sooner." and kissed my cheek which felt like summer.

"We need to start. But, I don't know your name only." I heard his voice and found that, it's true. "Varsha." I said with enthusiasm. Name mat not be a big thing to many, but for me, it means a lot. I have a connection with my name and also Rain that makes me feel special. But as soon as I said that, he started laughing. I stared at him in shock. This was the first time, I saw him laughing, but I felt belittled because he was laughing at me, at my name!

"Varsha? Who names their daughter Rain?" the mockery in his tone, was not something I was unfamiliar with, but it hurt me. I stared at me. "Ignore the bad, for its unimportant." My mothers favorite dialogue, she followed it all her life, but I always disagreed with her, even though I had been doing the same till now. I had an internal conflict in his to react now. I know I came from a very bad background, compared to his, but does that mean he can be reluctant, to me or things that are a part of me, as a wife what should I do?

A. N:-
Namaste! Cheesy..... I know..... But I guess this chapter was meant to be like this. I am sorry if I bored you. Tell me what you think Varsha should do....

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