heartbreak hill.

three.

—
jahseh onfroy

i stood silently watching angel scream her head off at jose. i still couldn't believe they were related, back in school they acted as if they've never met each other a day in their lives. my grip tightened on the backpack strap, i couldnt be here for too long. jose told me i had to go and make a few drops for him in a little while, and this was really cutting into my time.

"jahseh! what the hell were you thinking? what part of stokeley and i will help you did you not understand? you don't have to fucking do this." angel yelled at me looking irate. i don't know why she expected me to live off of stokeley and act like everything was going to be fine. i was capable of taking care of myself, even if it wasn't the best way possible.

"i don't want to live off of a guy i barely even know. i can take care of myself, angel." i stressed to her but she didn't buy it. at this point i was going to be late if i stood here any longer. i stepped around her and started towards the door.

"i'll be fine, i'll call if anything happens. you know i love you." i said and nodded to jose on the way out starting my way down the sidewalk.

—

i made all of my drops successfully and ended my night with about seven hundred dollars. two hundred fifty was going back to jose, he would up the prices as the amount of work he gave me gradually became larger. i crossed back by jose's place and dropped the money off. i had enough money to pay for a week at a hotel, still leaving enough to start saving up for an apartment of my own. i couldn't hotel hop forever.

the bus stop was a street down from me, i sat down on the bench and pulled a hoodie out of my backpack throwing it on. i leaned back staring up at the stars, there were so many. i swear i could see a few of them twinkling like they did in the movies. after spending a few minutes looking up at the stars the brakes of the bus caught my attention. i climbed up into the bus and paid taking a seat in the very back. watching the street side fly past me.

—
stokeley goulbourne

i guess i was still expecting jahseh to come back later tonight, i waited and waited and waited. nothing. he didn't even respond back to my message, but i guess it didn't matter. we weren't even friends all like that. i grabbed a bottle of water and walked back to my couch looking for something to watch, i needed something to keep my mind off of him.

i settled on black mirror. shut up and dance. just before the intro ended, angel came storming in red in the face. it must be serious because she started to pace back and forth, her ponytail swinging harshly behind her.

"what's wrong, babygirl?" i said turning back to the tv.

"jahseh is selling fucking drugs, when he could've stayed here and we would've helped him." angel spewed out waving her hands in every direction.

"that's his decision, angel. as much as i wanted him to stay here with us i can't force him to." i said shaking my head. i wasn't going to push the issue, but i also wasn't going to let it go. i felt livid for some reason, i stood up from off the floor and picked my phone up off the counter. i hesitated calling jahseh, but it was worth a shot.

i listened to the ring of the phone and to my surprise he picked up, with an attitude.

"who the fuck is this?" jahseh asked and i laughed.

"it's stokeley, i just wanted to ask you something." jahseh went silent for a moment and then told me to go on.

"look, i know you're selling at the moment. i would suggest you stop but i won't make you, i just want you to know that i have no problem with you staying over here. at least so we know that you're safe. please." i said and angel came from behind me staring at me waiting for an answer.

jahseh must've been talking to someone else, i couldn't make out what he was saying it was muffled.

"just give me some time to think about it, i'll let you know in the morning. i appreciate it but maybe you should think about what you're asking me, are you even sure you want a another person living with you?" jahseh asked me a question this time.

"as long as it's you, jahseh."

—
i kind of like this, i hopes y'all liked it anyway. love y'all sm. don't forget to take care of your hygiene.❤🏹.

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xxxanax