The Coordinates of Me and You

one | 42, -83

Sometimes people say true love doesn't exist anymore. They say cheating and playing around is more common than taking a girl out out on a date or bringing her flowers or just telling her she's beautiful. I completely agree with those people.

I don't know why I agree with these people. I think I agree because I've never experienced true love or maybe it's because that's what my mom used to tell me. She used to tell me it doesn't exist everyday for three years after my dad left us. She was pretty wrecked about it, and was on depression pills for a few months until the doctors decided she needed to be admitted to the hospital. While my mom was gone, my grandma watched over me. I had to move into the spare bedroom of my grandma's house which wasn't big enough for all my furniture and clothes, so I kept most of my belongings at my mom's house. Here and there I'd stop at my moms house after school to pick up a few things and to clean up since nobody was staying there. A few times, my dear friend Adam would tag along.

Adam and I had been friends since the third grade and now we were juniors in high-school. Some people thought we were secretly dating, but we never had that type of connection. We were always close, but never flirted, not once. My girl friends always tried to tell me that he definitely had a secret crush on me, but I think if you hang out with someone almost every day for eight years, a secret like that would have slipped out long ago. Anyone would be glad to have a friend like Adam as he was always a great listener.

"I just don't get it. It has been seven months since shes been admitted and the doctors haven't mentioned her going home yet, not once. Is she just supposed to live the rest of her life in that place?"
"Sam, why don't you just ask the doctors about her progress? I know they can't tell you everything, but as her daughter, they ought to tell you something," Adam said, closing my closet door. "Just give them a call."

I sighed in distress, "Adam, I call them every Monday to see how she's doing and all I get is a shitty response claiming she's progressing and they'll call me when the doctors say she is ready to come home. And on top of all of that, I can only talk to her when she wants to see me, which is close to never."

Adam lied next to me on my bed. He was quiet for a few moments before he came up with the idea that changed everything. "Why don't we drive to the hospital? You can talk to the doctors and get answers from them rather than that nurse who always answers the phone."

I thought about it for a minute. If the doctors did give me answers, I could stop stressing about my mom all the time and maybe I'd be able to talk to her for a little bit. But with my luck, I'd be asked to not show up unexpectedly and have to leave. With no answers. Yet, Adam talked me into it and before you know it, we were outside of the hell my mother was trapped in.

INPATIENT glowed in bright red letters above the entrance of sliding doors. As I walked in, I looked back to make sure Adam's car was still there. I knew it would be, because he never left me alone at this place. He knew sometimes I'd be here for hours and sometimes I wouldn't stay longer than a few minutes, but he never left. He stayed right where I left him and never complained.

"Excuse me, is Doctor Nile in? I'd like to speak to him."
The nurse didn't look up from her computer when she responded which frustrated me because she made it seem as if I wasn't important enough to have a conversation with her. "He's in a meeting right now, you'll have to wait."
"How long?"
"I don't know, maybe an hour or so. Is this an emergency or do you want to leave him a message?"

She still wasn't looking at me. "I'd like to speak to him now, please." I had to force myself to say please because I didn't really think she deserved my manners as she always had a rotten attitude whenever I spoke to her. She dialed some numbers onto the desk phone and held the phone to ear. She rolled her eyes before speaking.

"Hi Doctor Nile, sorry to bother you but there's a young lady here who is pretty eager to talk to you right now." Eager. Really, lady? Eager? "Okay I'll let her know."
She placed the phone down and told me to have a seat in the waiting area. "He'll be with you shortly."

I turned around without saying thank you and sat in a green chair against the wall. I flipped through a magazine until Doctor Nile appeared in front of me. "Miss Jacko, I wasn't expecting to see you here."

I sighed as he sat down. Of course he didn't expect to see me there because I had no reason to be. "I want answers. I want you to be honest and tell me what is going on with my mom. She has been here for seven months and within those months I have only been able to see her four times and the on the phone twice. Whenever I call, that lady says she's progressing but if that is the case, then why can't she come home yet?"

I said it in one breath. I didn't have time to breath, I needed to know as soon as I could before I exploded.

"Samantha, your mom is very sick. I know you already know this but not much has changed. She is progressing in positive ways, but slowly. Very, very slowly."
"Has she mentioned me?"
"She has, a few times."
"Why can't I see her? Why can't she come home?"

He took a deep breath. "Sam, I know it's been a long time. Longer than it should be, but I think your mom is doing well. I can see her going home within the next few months."
"A few months? It's been seven! You're not being clear on what's wrong with her, you-"

A nurse came running towards us. "Doctor Nile, Alyssa Jacko tried getting herself out of bed, fell and hit her head."

Doctor Nile looked at me and mouthed the words "I'm sorry" as if he actually were. He got up and dashed for the doors with the big words EMPLOYEES ONLY. I should have gone home, but instead I stayed in that chair. Adam came in after I texted him and sat next to me for hours. He never got up to use the washroom or to stretch his legs. He never even asked what happened. He stayed with me and allowed me to squeeze his hand as hard as I wanted like he always did.

It was a Friday night and we should have been out, drinking with our friends, but instead we sat in the inpatient waiting room for four hours. My grandma walked through the sliding doors which meant something bad had happened, because they only called her when something went wrong. She slowly sat down beside me.

"Samantha, how long have you been sitting here?" She said it softly, as if I didn't already know. When I didn't answer, she cried.