Shining Distraction [slow updates]

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Hi guys.

You may have noticed this isn't a new chapter and I apologize but, uhm, I've got some things to say...

First of all, I am so SO sorry that it has been forever since my last chapter. I am in love with this story and I want - no, I need to finish it but, right now, it's stressing me out. Big time. I'm a perfectionist to a fault and it's been my biggest weakness as of late. All I do is think about this book and the fact that it's taking me so long to get an update out and, if I'm honest, it's not fun anymore, you guys. I need it to be fun again. The excitement I used to feel when I wrote just isn't there lately and it's very discouraging and heartbreaking. You guys deserve my best work and, unfortunately, I can't deliver that right now. I have gone out of my way to avoid even logging into Wattpad the past few months because it almost feels like it's taunting me, further cementing the fact that I've failed. Ugh.

I hope you'll read this note and understand what it means - I'm not quitting, I could never do that; I love these characters and this story and everything that's happened and what I've got planned for it (trust me, it's good), I love the whole thing too much to quit but I need it to feel less like a chore before I can continue. This isn't an admission of defeat, it's just the only thing I could think to do to relieve some of this pressure I've been putting on myself and my writing.

This isn't anyone's fault but my own.. I struggle a bit with anxiety and it hasn't been the kindest to me in the past couple of months. I'm not here for sympathy, that I can promise you. I simply thought I owed you all an explanation for my absence and lack of updates. I felt I wasn't being fair to you all and I couldn't handle that.

Honestly, though, the main reason for this note is to let you know of some things that I'll need to change within the existing chapters, mainly the last two - ten and eleven, both currently unpublished. As most of you may know, chapter ten teased at a crossover and then chapter eleven was the crossover, privately and fondly referred to for months as Dah Chaptah. Unfortunately, the crossover will no longer make sense because my collaborator thepengal has decided to change some details in her own book - the names of her characters. Because of this, it's going to take me a bit to re-work the end of chapter ten, as well as decide what I'd like to do with chapter eleven. At this point, a whole new chapter seems like the most doable. Now, I can't stress enough that I support her 110% in this decision as I can't imagine dealing with the amount of (rude and unnecessary) comments she gets regarding her choice to change the names of the One Direction members she used as face claims in her story. Something that, quite frankly, isn't any different than me using Gillian Zinser in this story as Charlie Sorbo. No matter who you choose to write about, unless it's explicitly stated and sourced as non-fiction, everything about these books is fiction and it shouldn't matter whether the author chooses to call a character Harry Styles or Henry Greenberg. It's definitely disheartening to think that something the two of us worked so hard on together has, ultimately, become obsolete. Speaking for myself alone, if anyone reading this note was, at any time, someone who left a negative comment about V's decision to use names other than Harry, Niall, Liam, and Louis in HER story, I hope you realize that your words carry more weight than you might think and you should work on being a little kinder.

In closing, I love you all so damn much and will never be able to thank you enough for the support and love you've shown me. I feel like I've been letting you down lately and I'm so sorry. I hope you'll forgive me. I will do my best to get back here as soon as I can and I hope with all my heart that you'll be here when that happens. I'll never get sick of saying it so, once again: thank you, love you.

xx.
-T.

PS. If you'll let me, I'd also like to use this as a chance to thank every single person who's added this book to their reading lists, or the new readers who've voted and commented. It means the world to me, it really does, and while I'd normally acknowledge each of you separately, my distance from Wattpad lately has hindered that. Please, just know, I appreciate your support more than you know. xx