Run Away

Chapter 36

Dear Tessa,
Well, California lies behind us and a whole new adventure lies before us. I feel refreshed. I feel like I can be hopeful again. I feel like maybe after all I can keep going because this life is full of so many possibilities. Who knows what this next destination will bring? Who knows who we will meet. Maybe I will even find you. It feels like we are started a whole new beginning where one can look forward to the things before us and let go of the things that haunted us in the past. Of course I'm dreaming though. My search for you will never leave me. Your disappearance will always haunt me. I will never be able to outrun my past. I know I'm going to have bad days like the ones following the mountains. I know I'm probably going to have more nightmares and cry more tears before the journey is over. But right now, that doesn't matter. What matters is the possibilities that lie before us. Now enough with my physiological thinking. Even though I'm hopeful, I can't help but hurt. Sierra and I took a picture before we left with our luggage, and I love it. But Tessa, that's supposed to be me and you. Even though I love Sierra, it hurts knowing that we had all these plans together and now it's me looking for you and making these memories without you. Soon though Tessa, we will reunite again and I will be able to tell you all my stories and you can tell me all of yours. Maybe you've met some amazing travel buddies too! I hope you have. Then we can become one big friend group, traveling the world together.
~Tayia.
I smiled as I folded the letter and tucked it into my carry on bag. I had a good feeling about this trip and it seemed like we were leaving all sorts of toxic stuff behind us in California. I just hoped it would stay there.
"Are you excited?" Garrett asked, squeezing my hand. He sat beside me and I sat in the window seat. Jordan and Sierra sat a couple seats behind us and across the aisle.
"So excited. It feels like a whole new beginning!" I grinned up at him. He nodded.
"I know how you feel. What with Lance threatening me and your nightmares, California just wasn't a place of peace anymore." As much as it hurt to admit it, he was right. I loved California but right now, it was bent on destroying us. Maybe someday we could go back and it would be different.
"Yeah. Besides we were all getting restless. It was time to move on you know?" I said softly. He nodded his agreement. I leaned my head gently on his shoulder and looked out the window at the clear blue sky we were flying in. We had a long flight over the ocean ahead of us and I was prepared for it. I closed my eyes and slowly drifted to sleep.
****
"Will she want anything?" These were the first words I heard when I woke up, but I kept my head nestled on Garrett's shoulder as I tried to make sense of what was happening.
"Umm. Maybe get her a sprite." He answered. The unmistakable sound of ice being placed into the plastic cup and the can of sprite snapping open made me realize what was going on. The stewardess was coming around with drinks. I felt Garrett move to place it on my tray and I slowly opened my eyes and sat up.
"Mm thanks Garrett." I murmured, sleepily reaching for the cup.
"Your welcome. Have a good nap?" He asked, smiling fondly down at me.
"Mmhmm." I replied. I was still tired and I was trying to wake up. He chuckled at my groggy state. I let myself wake up for a minute and then reached for the phone inside my bag. I pulled it out and my fingers hovered over the numbers of my parents. Should I text them? Will they care? Slowly, I pressed on the number with my moms name attached to it and wrote out a message.
Me: Hey Mom. It's me, Tayia. I know you haven't heard from me in a while and I'm sorry. I just thought I'd let you know that I'm safe. I'm headed to Europe now. Love you!
Taking a deep breath I hit the send button. I watched as it sent, and sent and then Message Failure: message could not send.
I sighed and tried again only to get the same message. At the third try, a new message popped up.
This phone is no longer in use. Please call Sasktel to set up a new account.
I stared at the message in disbelief. I had known that at some point my bill would expire. But some part of me in the back of my mind believed that my parents would have kept paying for it so that they could keep in touch. My heart sank. Even they didn't want to hear from me anymore and that hurt more than I could imagine. I threw the now useless phone back into my bag and blinked back the burning tears that threatened to spill over.
"What's wrong?" Garrett was watching me closely wth a worried expression on his face.
"I can't text home anymore. Apparently my parents decided to either cancel my phone plan or stop paying for the bills that were coming in. Apparently they don't care if I'm safe or not. They don't care about me at all." I huffed out. A little part in the back of my head was whispering that this wasn't true. My parents loved me unconditionally and wanted to protect me. They wouldn't do anything like this. I refused to believe it though.
"Well, maybe you don't need those people back home. You have us now. A new life and a new beginning. If they don't care about you, then don't care about them." Garrett was right but I knew that that also wasn't true. At some point in my life I would have to go back home and when I did, it probably wouldn't be pretty. But I couldn't run away forever. Or could I?
***
Ok so I just thought that I'd let you guys know where I want to go with this story. I know it's long and still not done and frankly I think I spent too much time on California. Personally I am getting a little tired of writing it and I feel like you guys might be getting bored of it as it is dragging out so long. Also I'm really excited for the ending since I have it all planned out and have had it planned since the start of this book. (Some things have changed though) 😂 So here is my plan. I'm going to do some chapters in Europe and then in one more destination I have in mind. Then the story will start coming to a close. I just thought I'd let you guys know this since I don't think I'm going to spend as much time on these next few destinations. It might seem like I'm suddenly rushing to just get it done and seem weird but I plan to possibly go through it and rewrite it once the whole book is done and I've let it sit for awhile. Anyway those are just kind of my plans! Thanks for reading this long speech and thanks for sticking with me and this story! 💖 ~ S