2am Habits (Bill Skarsgård love story)

Chapter 12

I slid my phone away from me as I turned to look at the television. I bit my nails in anxiousness trying to focus on the movie that was playing. I wanted to pretend that my phone wasn't next to me. I wanted to pretend that Bill hadn't just texted me.

Without thinking, I reached for my phone, caving in. I sighed as my fingers began to type away. It was dumb, I know, but I couldn't help it. I wanted to have something I couldn't, it was human instinct.

"Yeah"- Ella

I slid my phone away from me once again across the coffee table hoping he wouldn't respond, because if he didn't respond, I wouldn't be sneaking out at 2 am to meet up with someone who was slowly going to break me apart.

I felt my heart sink when the vibration of the phone caused the coffee table to shudder. It couldn't have been any louder, mocking me. I was hesitant at first, I sat there frozen, afraid to make any sudden movement. Afraid of my own actions. I knew I'd respond just as fast as he had moved on from that blonde woman from earlier today.

My shaky fingers opened the recent text message

"I'm outside"- Bill

"Shit" I murmured to myself as I sat up from the couch. I quickly ran to my closet, grabbed the nearest coat as I stumbled into my shoes. It felt like I was flying out of the house and the cold air of the night engulfed me immediately. I don't even remember running down the stairs but soon I found myself in front of my apartment complex looking for the familiar car that held so many memories and emotions.

I looked around for what felt like a couple seconds before my eyes fell upon the dark car. Unlike earlier, I took my time making my way over to it, hesitant with every step. I knew Bill could see me through the tinted windows and there was no turning back now.

When I opened the car door, I was surprised to see Bill looking straight ahead instead of at me. It's like he didn't want to face me, as if he was ashamed.

"Hey" I said trying not to sound disappointed.

"Hey" he responded quickly. He didn't even allow me time to buckle myself in before he started the ignition and sped down the road. Even under the circumstances, Bill looked extremely attractive. I was sure he looked attractive under any emotion.

"So" I began to say trying to cut through the thick awkwardness before Bill cut me off.

"I have to talk to you" he said sharply

"I would hope so" I laughed awkwardly as I looked around the car, signaling his intentions.

He ignored my joke and instead stayed silent, as if he was thinking.

"I-"

"You-" we both said at the same time, interrupting ourselves. I laughed awkwardly trying not to make it obvious that I could feel his cold affection.

He sighed heavily, almost annoyed before his hands gripped onto the steering wheel. Without warning, he made a sharp turn where he wasn't supposed to, causing me to slam lightly against the passenger door.

"What's your fucking problem?" I snapped at him as I gave him a confused and angry look. He quickly parked in an empty and dark street, turning the ignition off immediately. His hands didn't leave the steering wheel as he looked straight ahead, refusing to look at me. I subconsciously began to rub my unharmed arm as I pushed myself against the car door to get a better look at him.

We sat in silence for what felt like an eternity before he finally spoke.

"You saw me earlier" he said as he continued to look ahead towards the empty street. He began to bite his bottom lip, as to stop himself from saying more than he needed to. My eyes shifted sideways as a random homeless man walked by, obviously on something. It was also obvious we were not in a safe area of town. Yet the man seemed like he was more sane than me, than us.