Millions [Poetry]

retrograde galaxy

retrograde galaxy

feb5twenty18

I've never known my heart had such a weakness left untouched by all the world, and it seems so dummed down.

for it means the world to me, it is everything; it is my most passionate love, my most bitter hatred, my 3am tears..

nobody stares into my eyes directly; they'd never see how the galaxies within them are not eternal dark, but adorned with a plethora of color and light so stunning I ache every day.

for I do not wish to be called beautiful, but I desire the songs in my head be pondered late at night, the chords resonating in your bones the tune taking root in your thoughts of me.

the constellations in my mind are boundless, and you are every single star.

I hold together so much color that I must filter it through a greyscale so that everyone else can see another side of me. but they truly do not see the colors that painted me raw into the mornings of the defining nights of my life.

I cry, for nobody sees the stars in my mind the way I do, and I am lonely. so achingly lonely, I desire someone to share my galaxies with without barriers or ravines.

I cry, because while I may be a star in others' malleable galaxies, I am their star.

and as I do the things I do and feel the way I feel, my biggest fear is that I am alone in them, for who else could be thinking in fading rose tints pounding blood red in their vision?

I stare up into the multicolor galaxy of my mind alone, and so I sit, horribly lonely but singing along.