Jade's POV
Today is the day of mums funeral. I'm standing in front of my mirror trying to make myself look nice. I am wearing a black dress with stockings and old black flats that used to be Jesy's. Leigh-Anne comes into my room and looks at me. She makes her thinky face, the one where she scruches up her eyebrows and sticks out her tongue slightly, and then she turns away from me to get something out of the draw behind her.
"Here we are." she says holding out a black bow and pinning it into my hair.
"Now you are complete." i turn around and smile at her. I grab her hand as we walk back into the room to find Jesy and Perrie waiting for us. I reach into my dress pocket for my speech and find that it is, in fact, still there. I tend to lose things easily, but I'm glad I didn't lose that. We all walk out the door to the taxi waiting outside that Jesy had called. As we get into the car I think about how we haven't gotten in one since mum died. I start to get a little frightened and hold onto Perrie's hand. I can tell she is thinking the same thing when she starts to shake a little. I can always tell when Perrie is scared because she starts to shake. I tap Jesy on the shoulder to get her attention. She turns to look at me, her face in a dazed expression that she gets when she is trying to be strong for everyone, but is to broken to know how. I notice these things about people. I may be more reserved but i know everyone's wierd quirks and habits. I take pride in it.
"Yeah, Jadey?" Jesy asks
"Perrie and I are scared of being in a car." I say
I do that a lot, talk for Perrie, because she doesn't like to speak much and I can always tell what everyone is feeling. I don't really mind, I'm actually very protective of Perrie even though I am younger. She seems so fragile partically because we are the same height because shes small for her age, and she lways has this look in her eyes that look kind of broken.
"You want me to sit between the two of you?" Jesy asks.
Perrie and I both nod our heads and let Jesy come between us. We grab her hands and the call pulls out of our street. I lean back in the seat and close my eyes. I try to take my mind off of everything by pretending I'm somewhere else/ I pretend that I live in a big house with a backyard and two parents. I pretend that I want to be given up for adoption and that I had a happy life. I sit there and dream about that life for the rest of the car ride. Finally the car comes to a stop and I look at the church. Lots of people are coming in already so we get out of the car and walk in. As we alk I can feel all eyes on us. Suddenly we aren't the Thirlwalls, the one parent family we are those poor kids who live alone and just lost thier mother. As we get to the front my aunt comes up and hugs us all. We polietly hug her back but then we sit in silence. It's like no one knows what to say anymore. I look up at the front of the church and the minister comes and starts. I don't really know most of what he is saying so I just wait for him to call my name to read my speech. Everyone around me has started crying but i haven't. I think I ran out my sadness in the past couple of days. One by one my sisters leave my side and go and read their speeches and I start getting restless. I wiggle a little bit and accidently kick Leigh-Anne. I whisper sorry and try to sit still again. Finally I hear my name being called out to read my speech and i carefully stand up and take the speech out of my pocket. I walk to the front and can feel all eyes on me. It's dead silent. Not a single sound has come from anyone of any age. My palms start to sweat a little but I reach the front and turn around holding my speech so I can see it.
"My Mum was a good person," That was the first line. I sigh because I couldn't think of a better one but i continue anyway.
"She always knew what to say at the right time. She may not have always been round but she always tried her hardest to make everyone happy. She cared about my sisters and I more than she cared about herself. It made me worry about her sometimes, she often worked a full 24 hours just to get enough money so we could have new clothes for our first day of school even though our old ones were perfectly fine, if not a little patchy. She was really a selfless women and she will always be my role model. I would now like to invite my sisters up to sing a song in memory of my mum, it was one of her favourties. I miss you and love you loads mummy, rest in peace."
"I was a little girl alone in my little world who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees, and fed my houseguests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green.
I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest swing.
I had a dream.
Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park, I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me, God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.
I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest tree.
I had a dream.
Now I'm old and feeling grey. I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well, there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now, I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.
I had a dream"
Everyone started clapping when we were finshed and we returned to our seats. At this point I was crying and so were my sisters. We all hugged eachother and waited for the service to be over. The service emded soon and everyone got up and started walking towards us. Everyone said that they were sorry for our loss and that we had nice voices. We said thank you but I started to get emotionally drained and sleepy and soon I was in Jesy's arms drifting off to sleep.
