Just Dont.. // Chandler Riggs

Chapter 8

I get home and throw my bags down on the porch, falling onto the porch swing and letting my head lay back.

I hear footsteps on the porch and look up, seeing a pair of all-to-familiar ocean blue eyes.

"Hey Shai." He says simply as he sits down next to me, pushing the swing with his legs.

"Hey? What the hell do you mean 'Hey'?" I mock his tone. Or what I thought it sounded like. He looks at me blankly, so I continue. "Bitch please. You ignore me all day and expect to come over here and us be all buddy-buddy. I should put you on split-a-wig.com you asshole." I snap, putting my elbow on the back of the swing, facing him.

"I'm sorry Shai. I just didn't know how to talk to you. I just felt bad and I'm sorry." Chandler says in a hushed tone, looking over at me.

"Mh-hm. I totally believe you." I chuckle sarcastically, standing up to walk away.

I'm stopped by a hand grasping my wrist tightly. I flinch, yanking my arm away and holding It behind my back as I rub it. I can feel the blood seeping through my hoodie.

Chandlers eyes follow my arm, then bolt back up, looking into mine. "Please don't tell me.." He trails off, stepping forward. "Let me see." He whispers.

I hesitantly pull the arm from behind my back as silent tears start to fall. Chandler pulls the sleeve up and takes a look, his eyes getting wide. "I'm sorry. I didn't-I just-please don't hate me." I cry.

He looks back up at me and pulls me into my house. Mama had another job interview today. She wouldn't be home until 6:15. It was only around 4 right now.

Chandler holds my fingers in his, pulling me to the kitchen. He turns on the water and wets a rag, turning to me. "Please don't hate me." I say again. He locks his eyes with mine and shakes his head, "Take off the sweater." He demands. I do as told, revealing all the cuts up and down my arms.

Chandler takes the rag, wiping my arms lightly, never taking his eyes off my mine. He finishes and sets the rag on the cabinet. "Where are the rest?" He asks quietly. He was standing at least 3 feet away from me.

I point to my legs and stomach. "Take it off." He whispers, looking down a little at me. We were the same height but I was slouched over slightly.

I widen my eyes, "Chandler." I complain.

"Now." He demands. I groan, pulling my shirt off quickly, then my jeans. "Get on the counter." I do as told, pushing myself up.

My back arches, sitting taller as he takes the rag and looks at the cuts, wiping dried blood on my bare stomach. All I was in now was black boy shorts and a black bra.

Chandler looks down, wiping the blood from my thighs. Then looks back up slowly, setting the rag on the counter next to me and taking my arm lightly. He pulls it to his lips as he kisses the cuts softly. "Chandler." I say smally, putting my other hand to my mouth as tears fall harder.

Chandler looks up at me as he trails soft kisses up my arms and to my lips. His soft warms lips meet mine and I instantly kiss back, not once thinking about anyone else or the fact that I'm in my underwear.

His warm hands find my cold bare thighs, causing me to shiver and goosebumps to appear. My legs wrap around his torso, pulling him between my legs. He chuckles against my lips, running a hand over the cuts. Chandlers tongue allows itself permission into my mouth.

I accidentally let a soft moan escape and pull away, looking down at the ground and moving legs. "I'm sorry." I whisper. "I didn't mean to kiss you. I don't want to hurt you and Hana's relationship. It wasn't something I intended. I hate myself. And I don't blame you if you hate me too." I admit, trying to get off the counter but him puts his hands on my knees, keeping me there.

"Is that why you pushed me away?" Chandler asked quietly, putting two fingers under my chin to make me look up at him.

I nod slowly, looking down on him since I'm still on the counter.

"Don't hate yourself. You're beautiful and sweet and anyone would be lucky to have you. You have good intentions and are extremely talented. And I don't hate you." Chandler whispers, kissing my lips again.

I put my hands on his chest, kissing back but then pulling away. "But what about Hana?" I whisper.

Chandler looks down, holding our hands on his lap. It felt so good to hold his hands in mine. "I still love her." He says quietly.

I feel my heart shatter into a million pieces. The silent tears start again and I pull my hands out of his.

You should have seen that coming Shai.

I nod, looking down again. "Does it hurt that much?" He asks quietly.

My head snaps up to him, "You made me feel special. You made me feel good. Alive. Don't ask 'Does it hurt'. Duh. It hurts. Get away from me." I push him by his chest away, dropping to the floor.

"She's my girlfriend Shai!" He defends.

"Yea. And I'm just the daughter of your Moms friend." I growl, grabbing my hoodie and pants, stomping up the stairs. I hear the door slam shut to the house and automatically run to my blade.

Chapter 8! This one hurt my feels tbh. What'd y'all think? I like this chapter actually.

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